THE FEAR....
hello guys
i've so far been a lurker on this site, so feel a little rude to suddenly ask you all for your help before properly getting to know anybody, but we (myself, husband, 6 year old daughter) are moving to france next month and i am having the biggest attack of 'the fear' known to man. Every fibre of me is screaming 'don't do it, stay where you are, it's a ridiculous idea'... but we are almost there, we've found a place to rent, enrolled our child into school, i am currently doing my last day in my office (where i've worked for 9 years) and told the world and his wife. Where has the excitement gone?
Someone please reassure me that this is normal, i feel like i shouldn't go because if it was the right thing then i wouldn't feel so hysterical.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Kent Shelley on -
Just nicked this quote off a French friend, it might help:
Si vous pensez que l’aventure est dangereuse, essayez la routine... Elle est mortelle.
Good luck
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Permalink Reply by Andrew Hearne on -
Good God that's so true and soooo French !
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Permalink Reply by Emily Montès on -
I agree, Andrew! Good one, Kent!
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Permalink Reply by Thea Freeman-Smith on -
Love that! The prospect of spending my life in the same place was not appealing. Now then, onto matters of great import, do the French eat goose for Christmas lunch? We are arriving shortly before Xmas and I want to know the lie of the land!
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Permalink Reply by Lyn McIntosh-Sherwood on
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Thea, when we spent Christmas with my French cousin they ate goose for Christmas lunch. Being an American I do a Thanksgiving Day dinner and have to order a whole turkey from the bouchier because one cannot find a whole turkey in a regular supermarket until after the first of December. Having said that, however, the turkeys we've ordered have been some of the best we've ever tasted. :-)
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Permalink Reply by Thea Freeman-Smith on
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Hi Lyn. Thanks for letting me know. So, turkey is available in the supermarkets in December then? Great, I'll have both!
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Permalink Reply by Nicky Peet on -
love that!! Sooo true!
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Permalink Reply by barbara deane on
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Of course this is normal....FOR many people.
We are all different...
WHERE are you moving to and what are you moving from?
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Permalink Reply by Thea Freeman-Smith on
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Hello Barbara
We are moving to a village near Duras (SW France) from Saffron Walden (market town between London and Cambridge. Renting initially til we are confident it really is for us (renting out our house here too) My husband will continue to work as normal - he works all over the world - so it doesn't really matter where he is based.
I must say i feel a little less anxious now, the excitement is returning. I've just had an email from the school my daughter will attend with her start date etc, so another thing is ticked off the list!
Thanks for writing to me, i really appreciate all the replies from people who have done this themselves. Most people that we know haven't so don't really understand!
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Permalink Reply by Liz Bennett on -
Hello Thea
I'm not even a lurker, I've only just come across this site, I live 200kms/2hrs south of Duras, near to Pau, although I've been in France for 10 years, some things do still annoy me, like supermarkets and other shops that shut at midday, but that's more than compensated for when I can go off skiing for the afternoon, or a wonderful walk in the Pyrenees! And, of course, it's sunny most of the time down here in the sw.
If you like specific pantry items, like marmite, atora and lime cordial, bring plenty with you and all paper products are expensive over here!
Good luck with your move and I hope you settle in quickly.
I agree entirely with Annie's reply below too!
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Permalink Reply by Annie Rogers on
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Oh So normal! me too exactly the same! for me it was new marriage, new home new country, new language......... yep it is mad! BUT it is the best thing I have ever done, life has been hard, fun and then even worse than hard, BUT it is the best thing I have evr done! I am SO happy, but the adventure isn't always a picnic! Have a look at the discussionon what people whish they had known before they came, it might just help you evite some of the pitfalls and it may make you laugh!!!You will be fine. Life is good, and you know you'll never sit in your rocking chair wondering ahat would have happened if.............
Stay cool
Annie
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Permalink Reply by Joe Bergin on -
Hi Thea, A friend of mine recently posted this on Facebook. It resonates with me - a mere man :)
She Just Let Go
She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the "right" reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn't ask anyone for advice. She didn't read a book on how to let go. She didn't search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all the memories that held her back. She let go of all the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all the calculations about how to do it just right. She let go. Without a thought or word, she let go.
She didn't promise to let go. She didn't journal about it. She didn't write the projected date date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn't check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.
She didn't analyze whether she should let go. She didn't call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn't do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn't call the prayer line, She didn't utter one word. She just let go.
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn't good and it wasn't bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forever more.
Ernest Holmes
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