Helen, how awful for you. We are just off one of the routes to Compostella and my friend sometimes has people stop asking for a drink. Pretending to be a pilgrim is just as bad as abusing your hospitality.
We have to be careful of scammers trying to make bookings as well.
On the other hand we have had Christmas cards from two sets of our guests!
Yes Jayne I have had a similar experience.
I worked for someone I met here on this forum and it turned out that what I thought had become a friendship was in fact me being used as cheap labour.
Friends who treat you like a free opportunity to gain something and then show no gratutude are not friends they are worthless freeloaders and do not deserve friendship in the same way others do. They usually spend a good deal of time complaining about others and about how thay are very stressed and overworked. I did see it coming because every conversation we had was filled with bitching about how rubbish this persons other friends were and I kept thinking I wonder when it will be my turn?. No doubt that had become a tactic to boost a gullible persons self esteem.
I have no doubt that as soon as you offer a word of complaint to their face (which I did, but was ignored) or to others (which I then did because I had been ignored), when they realise they have been found out they will turn on you like a snake and try to make out you are the one who should feel bad.
It might hurt badly for a while -I was very upset- But donāt be. Move on. You are better off without them.
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Jo, it was not our friends but one of their children and their family. We opened up specially for them and our friend paid a very much reduced rate, really to cover our expenses and a nice dinner out for our pains.
I see my mistake, I didnāt read the group heading, āgite ownersā only the post - I assumed they were friends too and not technically paying clients. Your friends probably would be embarrassed to find out I would not mention it. They are better left out of it
I think they have enough on their plate at the moment.
Parisians ! ^^
Lately I turned down a long lost cousin (35 years with no news whatsoever!) āinsistingā on visiting us. A smooth operator, not giving me the option to say no. Well, I did. F* him. If he wants to see us, hotels arenāt far.
I do wish my long-lost French relations would make contactā¦but, I agree, I would be nervous of a first visit here, in my home.
My English cousin who I had not seen for over thirty years came for lunch here in the Clunysois last year and it went really well. They, like us, have a daughter in Germany and we are on their way there so we hope to see them again for a bit longer this year.
I have taken advantage of the hospitality offered to me by cousins who live just outside Paris for over 50 years. I am so pleased when they manage to visit my home so I can repay some of their kindness.
Sometimes it is other members of the family get in the way and that is why people become estranged.
Aquitaine David Martin
January 11
I have taken advantage of the hospitality offered to me by cousins who live just outside Paris for over 50 years. I am so pleased when they manage to visit my home so I can repay some of their kindness.Visit Topic or reply to this email to respond.
In Reply To
Christine Borrow
January 11
Parisians ! ^^ Lately I turned down a long lost cousin (35 years with no news whatsoever!) āinsistingā on visiting us. A smooth operator, not giving me the option to say no. Well, I did. F* him. If he wants to see us, hotels arenāt far.
Visit Topic or reply to this email to respond.To unsubscribe from these emails, click here.
Sometimes it is other members of the family that get in the way and that is why people become estranged.
He became estranged of his own accord and I was just a kid then. I have no time for 2-faced people, family or not. I used to, always hoping to find some good in them. Turns out, people donāt change. Lesson learnt.
We had a very similar experience with neighbours we thought were friends, they would call at all hours of the day and night asking for help (2300 - āoh,were you in bedāā¦āyesāā¦āsorry but we have a problem can you come over and helpāā¦), we helped them with fencing, looking after their llamas, training their dog, giving lots of advice and guidance etc etc etc, we provided dinners when they came round, yet apart from a cup of tea and slice of cake they never offered to help with anything in return (the guy did come round once to help with some fencing but spent all his time standing around with his hand in his pockets), then one day we asked how much they would want for us to use a stud male llama (we gave them the stud male worth about 3,000 Euros for free in the first place), they replied that they thought 250 Euros would be a suitable figureā¦that was it, end of friendship and when we said what about all the help we had given them, they had the cheek to reply that they thought that was all part of the service we providedā¦ Once I was asked if I could go round and help store some large bales of hay, I turned up at the agreed time of 0830 and no one was about, I waited for 15 minutes and then knocked on the door, they answered the door and were still eating breakfast so had decided to just leave me outside in the coldā¦when I went to walk away the guy said I was being unreasonableā¦now we help no one (unless it is an emergency) and ask for help from no one.
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I must point out that I would be delighted to meet my French cousinsā¦ contact was lost years and years agoā¦ as the older generations died off.
I know Grandma was born in Paris in 1894, but only have a very dilapidated address book to use for tracing folk.
Doubtless, if I actually do find cousin FranƧoise, or her familyā¦ I will throw timidity to the winds and invite them homeā¦ 
I like to think that, no matter what has happened in the past, if someone really needs helpā¦ we would all give it. 
Hi Sophie,
I hope you donāt mind me getting in touch. Iām looking for a bit of advice.
I bought a 2-bed buy-to-let in Montpellier about 6 years ago. I have a full-time tenant in it since then and he has been just about okay with regards to payment of rent, etc. I have a management company who does the admin. as I live in Ireland and my French isnāt very good.
Anyway, Iām semi-retired now and I would like to be able to use the apartment during the summer months (I know the difficulties involved in asking a tenant to leave but I think I can work round that).
Ideally what I would like is to maybe rent the apartment out to students/professionals during the year and have it available for my family at other times. Would you know, or could you put me in touch with local Universities or Businesses who may be looking for rental accommodation?
I have thought also about Airbnb but that would me employing someone to take care of the changeovers, etc. and I wouldnāt know where to start on that.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Regards,
Helen
Hi Helen,
Our flat is now with Airbnb and the first lot that came wrecked the place
as I mentioned. It takes a long time to configure the settings but Iām
nearly there
and remaining optimistic.
We used to have the flat with Homelidays which worked really well until
they were bought by a bigger group.
People book from anywhere, but always through one of the websites or
"plateformes" as they call them.
I am not listed with anyone local. You would still need to be on the spot
to let them in and out etc.
I believe there are a few agencies running flats but I havenāt used them as
Iām here. If I notice one
I will send you the details.
Call when youāre in town. 06 11 81 56 11.
Regards,
Sophie
2017-01-18 13:49 GMT+01:00 Helen McLaughlin <survivefrance@discoursemail.com
Thank you so much Sophie. I definitely will.
Whole different scenario with the same ending for me. I helped out family and it cost me, literally. Never mix business with friends/family. I have heard the saying āNo Good Deed Goes Unpunishedā Donāt understand it, but it seems to be the case.
If I was a philosopher I might think , taking someone elseās karma (lesson in life) on your own shoulders, only increases you own burdenā¦ but then I am not a philosopher, lol