Both members of the same party and nobody either ever noticed them or cared WT* they said, so clones at the very least ;-)
Hi Vic, my FIL was also on the arctic convoys and we have just received his belated star.
Fortunately, he solved the disposal problem for us by donating his body to medical research.
Blimey Brian. John Major was your FIL ?
Oh good, then I can enrich the nettles around our animals' graves. That suits me entirely :-D
Funny that, my former FIL had taken that form in life!
I had a look on the site for the Association Française d'Information Funéraire ( http://www.afif.asso.fr/english/cremation.htm ) which says the ashes may be scattered on private property so perhaps we could have done something different yesterday.
I've asked for my ashes to be chucked in the pond on the 3rd hole at Ploemeur Ocean, one of my favourite golf courses around here. The pond has a lot of my dosh in the form of golf balls so I figure 'Why not join it? '
My father in law died ages ago & mother in law kept his ashes in the garden in the pot they were 'delivered' in. Last year MIL died & was also cremated. My missus thought it would be a good idea to scatter the ashes together & as FIL was an Artic Convoy chap set off early one morning to take Mme Mutt for a walk & surreptitiously scatter the ashes at the low water mark on the local beach. The surreptitious bit failed as she hadn't accounted for having to crush up FIL underfoot as his ashes had by now turned into one large grey lump :-)
I never knew any widowers round our end. Only widdas, and plenty of 'em. We're back to that unlawful joke I couldn't write down a couple of weeks ago, about widdas and spouses ashes....
I remember when a piece and a cup of tea would be placed beside the urn in Scotland when a widow had visitors. Strangely enough, I never saw it the other way round with widowers. I suspect the urn was kicked over somebody's wall on the way to the pub...
In Lancashire, deceased spouses' ashes were ALWAYS in an urn on the sideboard. Widdas would spend their afternoons visiting each other, discussing the various deceaseds, and partaking of tea and cakes on dolly mats. They would regretfully clear off before 5, as that was when the jug of ale would be brought round by the corner off-licence boy :)
I would have no objection to be left to be eaten by carnivores as some people around the world do. However, that is illegal in France!
I think my parents' ashes were buried within the grounds of the crematorium in Cambdridge but I can't really remember. I do remember that we took my cousin's ashes back to his sister's house (which had been built for his parents) in Co Mayo and buried them and planted a rosebush on top. That seemed far more dignified.
I just tell people that when I clog pop, they should put me in a large black bag and leave me by the bins the following Tuesday.
I have been to four funerals, two of them cremations at the very modern, some glass,mainly concrete but bleak and sterile crematorium that looks like a wartime bunker in Bergerac. In both cases the ashes were rather unceremoniously taken across the road to the cemetery to some kind of area that I imagine is the same as you describe, then kind of swished about in the air. The second time was in the local wet fog that made the ashes stick together in clumps and from my point of view made a mockery of the scattering.
I have always be pro-cremation and accept that the way it is done the likelihood of exclusively one's ashes being exactly what are collected then scattered is unlikely, but those examples have put me off. I believe taking them to scatter oneself is discouraged but clearly not impossible since my OH has a couple of clients with their late spouse's ashes on a shelf or dresser of some kind.
It all rather makes me wish to be brought back here to be buried with our animals which is quiet possible as long as it is done 'properly' and within the legally required three days.