I LOVE that - thanks Martin !!
Lexicon for EU negotiators to use:
Ms Maybe should have waited until Saturday to press the Brexit button. A much more appropriate dateâŚ
âVoter Simon Williams told us, âItâs like the premiere of a new Marvel movie. We all know itâs a complete fabrication and not to be literally believed, but that doesnât mean we canât suspend disbelief long enough to appreciate it for its entertainment value.â
Reports have already emerged of a pallet of red paint being delivered to Boris Johnsonâs London residence.
Finally I found the hateful laws UK will get rid off:
Straight from the NewsdeskâŚ
Brilliant
Scary story, straight from the NewsdeskâŚ
Brought a lump to my throat, this story. My old stamping ground, the Kursaal. No foreigners in my day. Used to buy them a one-way ticket to the end of Southend Pier and see them off back where they came from. Happy days!
Peter, did you make sure they had foreign accents before they were thrown off
You canât rely on just looksâŚ
Using that logic, I would of thrown off by you, quite awhile agoâŚ
Martin
( plse note - I do not practice or promote the use of throwing anyone off Southend Pier)
I hear it has been renamed to Brexit-on-sea
At least the text is funny:
Isnât it reassuring that the potentially tricky business of leaving Europe, which could be awkward if weâre not careful, is in the soothing hands of Boris Johnson and Liam Fox?
Itâs like finding an unexploded bomb in your kitchen, so the army say theyâll get someone to diffuse it, and send round Paul Gascoigne and a kangaroo.
Liam Fox has proved his ability to behave delicately in international affairs, having to resign as Defence Secretary because he was sneaking a friend in to Government meetings without clearance. So along with him and Johnson, it will soon be revealed the rest of the negotiating team is Jeffrey Archer, Vinnie Jones and a couple of blokes who went down for the Hatton Garden heist.
The strategy for the opening session on car imports will be held in a warehouse in Peckham, where theyâll discuss how Foxy and Davey boy Davis keep Merkel distracted with some flannel about tariffs, while Big Nobbyâs boys drill through the wall and kidnap the King of Belgium.