I find the language used by estate agents very interesting. Do they have special training? You know the stuff “cup of coffee on the balcony in the morning”, “glass of crisp white wine on the terrace as the sun goes down”, “living the dream”. Then they use that euphemism that strikes terror into the heart of anyone who has experienced it – “it has potential” !!!
The best remark I have heard was when we were buying our current home.

“My God,” I exclaimed “just look at all those mole hills!”

“Just goes to show the quality of the earth in the garden” was the riposte from the immobilier.


I have been watching some Place In the Sun programmes recently as I did not have any UK based TV for some years and I find seeing different types of property for sale and the prices and state of those properties quite entertaining but…oh god I wish the prospective buyers would come up with something more original than “seeing myself sitting here with a glass of wine” every time, even with only views of some dingy old wall in front of them too. At no time has brexit ever been mentioned either and these are recent programmes since 2020 and the restrictions that would apply to would be buyers or permanent movers.

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I have heard Jasmine Harman ask a couple if they were aware of what they needed to do since Brexit, but in general, no.

Having bought in 2022, TBH I wouldn’t have mentioned Brexit either - it almost never came up in conversation. The ship has sailed and we could only operate from where we were now, rather than where things might have been 10 years before. I don’t know how new the people buying were to doing so abroad, but there was so much unknown that we had to start from scratch, and any changes were now the way it was.

Regret is a bitter cup that brings no-one any joy.


We watch PITS as we call it (because it is the …) ostensibly to see the properties but in reality, I suspect, so we can shout at the screen when yet another couple try to buy property for which they do not have the budget (“we’ve only got £50k to spend but want a 4 bedroom 2 bathroom place in the Dordogne with a pool”).

Either that or for the amusement of just how far from the brief some of the properties are - eg “I want a detached house with a garden” to be shown two adjacent apartments which aren’t usefully be connected (and which can’t be connected into a single living space) and with “outside space” consisting of a balcony and 10 square m of land halfway down a hill.

Usually a bid is put in on the place we think is least suited to their needs - or which we like the least (tastes do vary, of course, but ours are impeccable :wink: ).



If you look at the dates a lot of the programs being broadcast now are actually from before Brexit (at least before the end of transition) so the question might not have been needed.

This was a new programme, which is why I mentioned it.
I’m not in my dotage yet.

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What date were the viewings? (it’s in the end credits).

I didn’t suggest that you were - but even the “new” programmes seem to be digging out episodes that were filmed pre end of transition, possibly because not so many people are looking at the moment.

I’ve got some fantastic newsfor you, Jane and John would like to make an offer for the property at X.
The stock phrase of Jazzer as we call her.

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The phrase that really sets my teeth on edge is one used repeatedly by immobilier agents when presenting a property, “You can put your stamp on it.”

That says to me the place needs a complete overhaul, not just a little paint brushing.

A property that is beautifully presented inspires the viewer to imagine themselves enjoying the space, not having to put a new stamp all over to make it digestible.




We’ve always assumed that those phone calls are completely set up after the actual negotiation with the agent, probably chatting to one of the production team.

“I’m a full-time macrame teacher, my partner is a part-time pencil sharpener and our budget is half a million” Not so much PITS but property porn in general.

Ah - Jacob Rees Mogg :slight_smile:

No wonder the budget was half a mil.

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One Job Boris could actually do as far as the property misdescription act would let him.

My fave on that show has to be Sara Damergi who seems unable to stand in any town square or near any food or beverage establishment without making outlandish claims about the plat du jour. I can’t help but laugh as she seems to claim virtually every restaurant in every town and village in France will do you 5 courses of top quality food, wine, and with an owner so friendly he’ll eat with you on your table for 7€. I don’t doubt there are some good deals around but as things have been getting more and more expensive in life, and you’ve been getting Less and less for your money, over the past 5 years or so, , she seems to walk into any village and find the most incredible places for less than the price of a coffee, and then tells the house hunters nothing else about the place just describes the plat du jour! :laughing:


Inside or outside Space!
Who on earth came up with that jargon
On the same level as this is ‘your’ kitchen, bathroom, bedroom. No it isn’t, not until you buy it.

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Thats just an assumptive close, std sales speak.

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From the Cambridge Dictionary

Few examples

That last one may be close to the truth.

I have bought and sold more houses than I can remember since the first one in 1974. Never had a structural survey on any and they are, to my knowledge, all still standing bar 1 which would now have been in the middle of a B&Q carpark.
Estate agents were almost trustworthy all those years ago but the sales jargon they trot out now from mouths that know nowt makes me smile.
Listen to an episode of ‘Homes under the Hammer’
So many are sucked in by such programmes and buy a dud but hey it makes the world go round and money for okd rope is coined in by the estate agent time after time.

I’m afraid you’re not wrong. Property agents tend to be thought of as too thick to get a proper job, with the only skill required being economical with the truth. Bricks and mortar used car sales. Not that I would ever suggest such a thing