First let me wish you and yours a wonderful holiday season and a
happy New Year.
The holiday greeting and wishes for a Happy New Year are extended
from Ian Loughlin ("Wishor"), to you ("Recipient"), subject to the following terms and conditions:
This greeting is extended without obligation, implied or implicit,
best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible,
politically correct, gender neutral, celebration of the secular
winter solstice holiday only. Any similarities to religious
and/or national holidays are purely coincidental.
This greeting may be accepted in the context of the traditions of
the religious beliefs of your choice, or secular beliefs of your
choice, regardless of sexual orientation or operating system
preference. However, such acceptance by the recipient does not
imply any endorsements or consents by the Wishor.
My wishes for your emotional state, financial success, and freedom
from disease apply to the generally accepted calendar year 2011.
Any other calendars of choice from other cultures or sects are
subject to availability.
This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal,is
revocable at the sole discretion of the Wishor, and is non
transferable. The Wishor implies no promise to actually implement
any of the wishes. The extent of the holiday spirit experienced
will be determined by the effort recipient puts into it. The
claims described are for illustration purposes only. Your results
may differ. These statements have not been approved by the Food
and Drug Administration. This greeting is void where prohibited by
law. "Christmas" "God" and "Jesus" are registered trademarks of
the Tory Party; all rights reserved.