I have to say i'm quite discerning when it comes to kissing blokes !
I'm afraid I don't stretch to Piltdown Man...
Anyway, you would never get past the ever alert guard dog..
But I am closer to him, I could sneak up and give him a great big slobber with my winter warmer bristling in full glory.
Remote by a good few hundred km I fear. Ridiculous ? How jolly dare you sir !
I can say without any fear of contradiction that your chances of being kissed by me are remote...
Now, if you were to shave that ridiculous looking hippy beard off then you never know !
"Don't know how women can cuddle a hairy faced fella" Don't knock it 'til you've tried it sunshine. I've had me beard for best part of 50 years & never had any complaints ;-) With you re biseing blokes tho'. I'll stick to a good firm handshake thank you very much ! .
I recall in Calvados it was four Xs and in Charente two Xs and here in the Haute Vienne usually two tho' sometimes four. I've always been told to start on the left but usually forget and just leave it to the recipient to lead the way, a bit like my dancing actually ! Kissing men occasionally crops up with close mates tho' I try to avoid bearded or unshaven males...Don't know how women can cuddle a hairy faced fella !
Andrew, we're on a 2-3 boundary here too, in the Hautes-Alpes. In our Briançon arrondissement it's 2 ; south of Serre-Ponçon lake it's 3. The Gapençais (préfecture) are always slightly offended by our refusal to do 3 :)
What the hell. I have a big pile of Swiss Italian family who do as Italians do. Everybody has a good slobber, including men kiss each other, no counting since sometimes during a hug one occasionally becomes wetter than in the shower (OK, I exaggerate slightly, but only slightly). I am now at the stage of the embrace and bise with males I know better, no problem as far as I am concerned. What stands out above the bise though, is that the French, like Latin Europeans, look each other in the eyes and not avert that as northern Europeans especially Anglo-Saxons tend to. I have been told off for doing it in England, because it made people feel uncomfortable, now that I am able to do that naturally, the bise and all the rest of it seems rather an unimportant question. Mind you, I still frequently get the wrong cheek first...
even after years here it still doesn't seem right kissing (faire la bise svp !) my brothers-in-law :-O and that's three here, even if we're now in the Tarn, it's still part of the ségala up here in the north and so keeps the Aveyron's 3 bises. Unless you've come up to Carmaux from Albi then it's 2, we're on a kind of bise watershed...!
how about this to confuse the locals, give the person one big sloppy kiss on the lips and watch their reaction.
I all ways remember our french teacher at school explaining the kissing in France, she said it was one kiss for acquaintances, two for friends, three for family members and four for very close family members. don't think we ever got to five.
In île de france the custom is a kiss on each cheek starting with the left cheek.