When my first marriage ended I had to take on a second job to make ends meet which meant working seven days a week. No SKY contract, no going out, no holidays, no anything but I had a roof over head and was able to pay the bills and feed myself, perhaps I should have banged on my multi-millionaire boss’s office door for a handout?
Iphone contracts and holidays abroad are luxuries not essentials when you have little money or relying on benefits.
Stella when liivng in the country you need a car to get to do the shopping,
Yes getting medical attention…when needed really important.
Real friends…wonderful…
Timothy life is so different now.
So are you talking about life here or in the UK. I am still not clear because you switch from one to the other ?
Actually Barbara… In the countryside, it is common for neighbours to car-share with those who do not have transport.
In what way is life different now, I’m only talking twenty years?
It is different here in rural France…of course.
In London I walked to the shops if it was for light shopping.
You really have to stand on your own 2 feet.
There is no safety net.
Do any of you have family to help if you need some kind of help?
Well I don’t recognize any of that as normal, either here or in the uk, and those that do are probably just increasing their borrowing debt. The easy availability of credit has left many living on a precipice when things go wrong. They have a false impression of their own affluence. It’s really not healthy.
So what is normal Chris?
Please explain.
Existing Barbara. I’ve no idea what the figures are for household debt, but I bet it runs into thousands.
It is the second time in a week I have heared the word “existing”.
It came from a person who has a pretty good life and and all the things I mentioned
and much more. I do not understand these expectations.
Stella’s blueprint of a ‘normal lfe’ is spot on IMO.
Yes Stellas list describes existance.
Existance does not seem to equate to contentment.
Most people I know here lead a fairly simple life and
they all have some kind of holiday visiting relatives
who live in another region.
A three star hotel is no longer luxury standard and
can be found to be priced in a similar price range to
a B and B.
I do not know of any of my neighbours or friends who
share cars. They all seem to have one. We help each
other in many ways but we still remain independant.
As a rule a simple life in winter will mean doing work
within the house and garden or going out to work, returning,
cooking a meal sitting down for the rest of the evening with
something like knitting,watching the news on TV.
A simple life will include time spent walking the dog, having
a cup of tea with a neigbour and occasional dinner in a friends
house.
In summer there are many other things going on.
I would be very suprised …but I am prepared to be to be told
almost all of the viilgers here have a TV.
An they do seem visit relatives abroad or in another region.
They also seem to take holidays and stay in a b and b or hotel.
Many people do not do without is drinking…ah and smoking
cigarettes. This is a great exspence.
In England there seems to be a surge in ready meals…a waste of money.
In France I have noticed that gateaux and pastries sell
very well at around 10 euros a cake.
I rember life as a fairly poor child in London.
We had no car and occasionaly I went on outings with a school
friend whos father had a car. Social life was having friends and meeting to
go to a social club or possibly a dance from time to time.If there were presents
at birthdays and christmas they were inexspensive…as of course
was all my clothing and meals. Outings with my parents was predictable but enjoyable. We
would take a bus or 2 to Farnborough in Kent and enjoy a picnic in a field
behind the church. We would then walk for miles to Westerham and passed
small farms where we might stop to buy eggs or rhubarb.Finally we would end
our journey with tea and possibly a cake in a Windmill cafe.
Even poor kids went to the cinema sometimes and waited in line for a bag
of chips at the chippie.
Holidays would be a week on a farm in the Isle of Wight.
For some picking hops in kent.
What is different now to back then?
I have it…yes even though there was very little money it was far more
important to have treats and pleasurable times together than it was to
have a fancy home with fancy cars and fancy furniture.
Now every one seems to want it all.
Barbara, what you have described above is different to your earlier vision of 21st century essentials for a family of today, to achieve your vision of today the ‘rich’ have got to hand over 10% of their wealth and they are selfish baskets if they don’t. I grew up in the 60’s/70’s when things were indeed different, today want has overtaken need and everyone is poorer for it.
I have,infact modified it.
What is needed…it has altered with time just a little as expectations have
become more challenging and some things have moved from want to needed.
Yes want has overtaken need.
In London all the restaurants wanted to be the top…top and
even managing to pay the bills and keeping boyant was far
less important than fame. I loved running a restaurant and being a
chef but it took over my life, my health and everything else.
I got out at the right moment but I have seen the biographies and worked
with some of the top chefs in London and aspects of their life and health
have been destroyed by " want".
Look at George Michael who was rich. I think that his secret pleasure was
to give to people who needed a something. ThIs is a person who touches my
heart. Such an endless struggle he seemed to have in search of find the "long life of happiness.
Some times…as in his case you give quietly and privately .
We will never see eye to eye… that much is very clear. What you see as existance… I thoroughly enjoy. 
I think that you mistake what I need for what I see as what others need/want.
I look around me.
Tell me do you not take a holiday more or less each year?
Do you have a car?
We agree that people/friendship are of paramout importance.
existance is not enough.
The difference now is that people want so much more, and they want it right now. There is no stigma attached to debt, it’s perfectly acceptable in the modern world. I couldn’t live like that. One of the attractions I’ve discovered living here is that people don’t seem to crave so much stuff.
I know Farnborough and Westerham very well…I lived nearby.