Is honesty dead?

(Dominic Best) #81

Well why did you write, ‘ Really not sure about this dinner party. Please explain.’?
I was only answering your question.

(Barbara Deane) #82

Because I have played by the guest rules.
But the rules change for some of the members from time to time.

(Timothy Cole) #83

Barbara, please don’t do this. I’ve not been a member here for very long but I’ve not seen any special treatment as it were for certain people.

(Barbara Deane) #84

I am trying to understand why Vero mentioned dinner party rules.

(Véronique Langlands) #85

Barbara there is frequently a barbed tone perceptible in what you say. Dinner party rules are that conversational tone is not barbed in that way. Perhaps it isn’t intentional. Which is why I asked.

(Barbara Deane) #86

When did you join just out of interest Tim?

(Barbara Deane) #87

Vero…possibly reaction to attack.

(stella wood) #88

Barbara… you’ve been on this forum for years. You must be aware, by now, how things work… surely ??

In all honesty… if you are not aware… I suggest you re-read the guidelines …

(Timothy Cole) #89

@Barbara_Deane I’ve been a member of French forums since the early 2000’s which was when we bought our first house here and have used them as a tool to learn the in’s and out’s of French life as well as join in with a bit of banter. The one that I posted on regularly was FE but since the Brexit result it has become quite toxic so in the middle of last year I decided to find somewhere different and came across SFN. I still see myself as a newbie and have yet to decide whether my face will fit as it were.

(Barbara Deane) #90

OK well I have been posting on here as Stella mentioned for some years and then out of the blue
another member…a member of the team threatened me on line for no reason at all. Only one person
defended my situation and I got no apology. I was very upset and did not post for some time.
I have since met this person who made the threat and he said that he had no idea why he had done it.
Prior to that time we had engaged in all sorts of conversations.
So I do see that there can different views as to what is right and what is wrong.

(Timothy Cole) #91

This highlights the bad side of the internet IMO, people often say things on forums or social media that they wouldn’t say face to face which ironically ties in with the title of this thread.

(Barbara Deane) #92

I have forgiven him in a way but it is hard to forget.

I am defensive now but I respect the views of others even if I do not agree.

(Dominic Best) #93

Did you not understand my post explaining what she meant?

(Barbara Deane) #94

Every one must be polite…
So I have noted that and agree with that as a code of conduct.
Has every one else noted it too.

(Ann Coe) #95

Show me please on this thread where I have said all that to you personally Barbara . I always try to be polite but I don’t expect to have my words re-posted with a different slant or someone else’s words put in their place. I think that most of us would feel the same !
The title of the post is… ‘Is honesty dead’? Where does it say this applies only to tradesmen or women Harry? Maybe I am reading it all wrong.

(Ann Coe) #96

Here is my post in full, if someone spots an attack on Barbara here then please tell me !
Is honesty dead ? Maybe for some people ! There are ‘rip-off’ merchants out there, English lots, but some French too…
Personally, I couldn’t live with myself if by my actions I caused distress and harm to others. I am often told I am too soft hearted, but rather that than cause pain and hardship to others.
Like many others I have told the occasional ‘white lie’, I could never say for example ‘oh that dress looks awful on you why are you wearing it’, but to downright lie to profit myself no, no and no. I want to be able to sleep (if possible) at night without recriminations.
As for money, I have already said it’s not my God. I don’t care what others have, what they do with it, how they came by it is their affair.
I don’t feel the need to justify myself or to live in the past. My life is here and now and if I can possibly give a helping hand here and there so much the better…:slight_smile:

(Barbara Deane) #97

Ann was it you or was it someone else who told me that I should live in the here and now?
Was it you Ann?
However in your description of yourself you made a point about not living in the past.
Perhaps I have a vivid imagination but it felt like a dig.
Am I wrong Ann?

(Ann Coe) #98

Maybe you are just being paranoid, voilà is that honest enough for you Barbara?

I post on various threads as we all do, I don’t get at anyone, I like to try to be polite but as this doesn’t seem to be working today I will leave it there.

(stella wood) #99


I cannot see anything in Ann’s Posts which are or could be seen as a “dig” at you…

Thus, the answer to your Question… is Yes, you are wrong…

(Barbara Deane) #100

some times I am but who was it who decided that I live in the past?
Do you remember?