You are deffo a bot…
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Darren! I’m nuthin of the kind! I’m a very, very old but not yet gaga, pensioner, with very important stuff, still to do.
Fuck off, would be useless to a human poster, but for a bot it might be a basic indication of ‘temperament’ for the wires to pick up.
How far can a bot be driven, before it explodes in green smoke?
If you don’t get Bot comments, its perhaps because you are already approved, you have adopted appropriate forum behaviours, so you are considered fully adjusted, and accepted! 
well done! Another medal for your collection!! Wheeeeeeee!
Dan? Digression is AOK! I approve it, I’m interested in your deprived? Underprivileged? Background, as from my POV, its surviving the perceived suffering that is tiptop education and so worthwhile, not LCC or government brain bending!
But
I’m NOT anti formal edu. Not at all, but an enthusiastic supporter of whatever works best, whatever is kindest, whatever is available to be chosen, by each one of us.
You seem to be doing OK. Not complaining I hope?!
Bots don’t really work like that…
They evaluate your input and parse it through a series of “appropriate reply filters”. The clever bots have access to huge libraries of human language expressions and can make informed guesses of typical responses.
So saying “fuck” would result in…
“bleep”…“is this anger or playful or maybe sexual”…“bleep”… “respond with an expletive and check the input” …((if in doubt repeat back to the poster what they have said in a slightly different way)).
I think the computer blowing up is from Star Trek… the ultimate computer episode. A true classic.
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I don’t claim to be hi tech whizz! Darren, however, two minutes extra googling gives masses of interesting info!
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I think you are over estimating their complexity. The sales blurb of course will say “its just like the real thing”, but it isn’t. I recently went online to my bank and wanted to chat but hit a bot who was hopeless. Couldn’t find the appropriate funnel.
Its great at…
“where can I find x”
“What time do you close?”
but asking it for something as simple as…
“do you have a Euro Account you could offer me?” was met with fixed responses on holiday money.
If in doubt ask “are you a bot?”
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Not convinced! Must be about 5/6 years, since I was at a close up demo of one of the clever little “people” bots. Running, jumping …being helpful! How far removed was that bit of hi-tech. from a few short, matey/prickly answers on a forum!?
Anyway, totally fascinating. I love it all. At least NOW I understand all the passion about “the Russians”, and " the Chinese"… brainwashing Europe! Boris should be a bot, if he isn’t, and Mrs May? I will need to pinch some (warm) flesh, now, to be sure! But even then…!
Whilst I realise that the word “like” is not always used correctly, the word that really annoys me is addressing a mixed company of people as “You Guys”. Many times I have secretly gnashed my teeth in anger, so I would like to know if there are others who are of the same mind as me. I wll add that I am 76 and in mixed company, usually of folk age 50+, we have been addressed as “you guys”. I must say that recently the person who called us this was a young man of around 20 ish, so me being of acid tongue on occasions, I told him that the women present were not guys as they did not possess willies ! Immediately there was a chorus of applause.
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I applaud you @Rosie_Savage.
I bet it was a waiter at a trendy eating house… “you guys” seems to be big in trendy places. “You guys” is up there with “Nah worries” on the scale.
And Vero!
Hilarious! Does anyone talk to the Barclay Bot? Thinking of bank bots?
When you need to let rip with a vicious rant, plus your best lexicon of extreme verbal abuse…DO IT! on the ever peaceful, always hoping to please and serve, good natured Barclay Bot.
He is a bloke,
and I usually say YOU BLOKES! Rosie, for girls and boys. (I’m not deeply into gender division and don’t need to know if they have willies or not!),
The prob with Barclay Bot, is that he’s a Brummie?
Someone far North of Watford?
If you don’t answer his questions, with an appropriate accent, he doesn’t understand at all! When you can’t pick any of his choices for action, he offers “OTHER?”.
And you have to reply " Oother",
its got to be ‘OOTHER’! ‘Other’, is no use.
He keeps on trying, politely, till you think he will lose it!
OK,so my sense of humour is infantile too!! (Vero!)
That keeps me in stitches, attempting to please the bot with the charming puzzled/hurt repeat questions.
Guys don’t have to possess willies, Rosie. 
Hmmm, Well I for one think you are bonkers crazy lady.
Come over for G&T when we have the roof on
I have no idea what the Barclay Bot is 
.
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Oh! Imagine a world without the Barclay Bot!
If youve got a Barclaycard, and are fool enough to attempt to pay any of your debt via a phone, Barclaybot, is the bloke who talks to you about it.
Think of the most vile abuse you can manage, for him.
He smiles down the line, and says, very slowly…as if talking to a three year old…
“I’m sorry, I do not understand your reply, I will ask you again…”
That explains it, no Barclaycard .
I don’t know if French banks have bots, they probably do but so far if I have needed to talk to someone it has always been a person.
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Darren? Is that as in, free for all? Open house? Nobody EVER invites me for g and t. If you mean me too, I don’t drink alcohol except for very occasional plonk with my rice.
I think “You blokes/You guys/You gals/You chicks” are all deeply charming forms of address from whomsoever; and from a guileless young person even more touchingly so.
It reminds me of my own callow youth and all the times I have been indulged affectionately by older people who remember what it was to be young, and tender, and blossoming, and un-crafted in the stale conventions of the fusty old world. 
Of course! Who needs Barclaycards, in France? got a sweet message from my Fr. Bank this am, offering me a friendly chat, to sort out my accounts.
This year, is to be the year I buy an accounts ledger. And a spike file. Everything to be perfect.
Each to each. In English the person doesn’t need to call me anything at all, unless they know my name.
In French ‘Madame’ is the normal mode of address and that suits me fine.
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We have elder flower cordial