Annoying conversation of the day


(Claire OWEN) #1

Annoying conversation of the day;

Phone rings.

This takes place in French.



ME. Camping … how can I help

Customer. Are you a camping,

me .Yes, how can i help

Customer, I’m looking to organise my group for next spring we are looking for some where to stay.

Me -well we have emplacements what dates are you looking for.

Customer- Oh we don’t want to camp, do you have Gites?

Me- No but I do have 2 mobile homes that i rent out, how many people are you?

Customer- 16

Me - well that’s too many for me i have 2(emphasised) mobile homes that sleep 6 people each.

Customer- How many people can I sleep in each mobile home?

Me- You can sleep 6(emphasised) in each one. They have one double room, one room with 2 single beds and you can ake up a double bed in the lounge area.

Customer- how many mobile homes?

Me- 2 madame

Customer-Ohhhh and how much are they?

Me- That depends when you come and how many weeks you want can you tell me that?

Customer -we need one night in May

Me- The mobile homes cost X€ per night at that season they will only sleep 12 and you are 16 people

Customer - that’s not the price I have in my book.

Me which book are you looking at?

Customer - The pilgrims Guide( quotes name)

Me If you read the entry in that book you will see that it says ask for the special pilgrims rate so That the quote is correct . the pilgrims rate is X€ for the night which is for 6 people if you take both mobile homes then you will have to pay twice that.

Customer- You don’t have any Gites?

Me-No I am a camping I have emplacements and 2( Thinks count-em 1,2) mobile homes.

Customer Oh that won’t do at all… hangs up.

Me- Thank you ( even tho she’s gone) slowly bangs head on wall!!!



Where do I find inteligent customers please?


(Claire OWEN) #2

Yes, For our other buisness thsi weekend a 4 M stall with 9 Different signs; hanging, on table surface etc. plus tshirts on us saying what we do.Ist question What’s it made Of?
Me, pointing… errr Reconsituted Marble.


(Sandy Whitehead) #3

Oh Jane, didnt know you actually knew my Gran (s)!!


(John Hilton) #4

Claire I really enjoyed reading this, as you probably know every business would fantastic if it wasn’t for the customers.

We have trade stands at different shows and always keep a little book at the back to write down the stupidist question of the day such as:

Stand covered in promotional material, products on display every where, DVD playing showing what the products can do.
Customer. What do you do mate?
Me. We do protective coatings and sealants, polyurethanes and epoxys mainly.
Customer. How much would 4 tyres for my truck cost?
Me. Erm not sure, why don’t you go on to the Goodrich stand next door and ask them, they do tyres.
Customer now looking put out. Well if your not going to help I’ll go somewhere else. Then proceded to walk off in the opposite direction.

You’ve got to love 'em.


(Claire OWEN) #5

She must be related to my woman.I feel your pain.
It is an endless source of frustrated amusement to me that these people ask a question and can’t hear/listen to the answer, yet they were the ones who asked. Yesterdays Q&A session was fairly typical I have to say.
Just felt I had to vent, the headbanging alone was insufficient.


(Jane Williamson) #6

Or a split personality!


(Andrew Hearne) #7

love that one :wink:


(Sandy Whitehead) #8

My Granny usd to say that she had to talk to herself , because she was the only one who knew what was going on, and that it was ok until she answered hersef back , because that almost invariably caused an argument.


(Jane Williamson) #9

You know that the main reason that people talk to themselves is that they are the most intelligent person around at the time!


(Sandy Whitehead) #10

Hi Claire,

intelleigence is a rare commodity when you have a call from someone like that.

I had one recently, wanting a price for a nights B&B .

Asked the date, how many people, gave her the price.

She said is that for 2 nights?

I said if they stayed for 2 nights I would give a small discount. (Madame is shouting to her, obviously deaf and/or singularly uninterested husband)

He shouted something back.

She said Ok we will book those 2 nights but we won’t pay that price we will pay…, and tells me a price that is around half of our nightly rates. ie 25% of the cost of a 2 night stay
I said sorry, Madame, maybe I wasn’t clear, the price is …

She said , very grumpily , you were perfectly clear, but I dont want pay that price.
I said, sorry but that is the price.
She said, I want to stay at your chambres d’hotes because it is very close to my family , and my sister stayed there and told me how nice it was, and your bedrooms were very pretty and she was very happy there, I looked on the internet and I also want to stay there, but I don’t like the price
I said , I am very happy that your sister liked it here, and I am sorry that you dont like the price but that IS the price.

She then started shouting at me, her husband was shouting in the background, had no idea what they were saying, but gave up after a couple of minutes and put the phone down.

She called back 10 minutes later and started again, still have no idea what she was actually saying.

Don’t know where she stayed, but I hope she was very happy.

Cant help but feel we had a narrow escape!!


(Elizabeth Smith) #11

They’re a very rare species believe me


(Claire OWEN) #12

No, but I can do mobile homes. did I mention I have 2 of them!!!LOL