Be on time, at a dinner party, or not!

We do ask, but it makes no difference :wink: same story when we are asked up there, always seem to be too early :slightly_smiling_face:

Out for din tonight, folk with a hol’ home we keep an eye on.
Have to keep an eye on the clock :rofl:

Interesting observation. The same has happened to us, we were on time, others started showing up to an hour later, but at least 20 minutes late every time. After several times of this experience, we decided to show up late once, and we were the last ones to show up! Good grief. :roll_eyes::face_with_raised_eyebrow:

If you were I invited to an aperitif it is only for a drink. You should leave one hour after. You should politely leave one hour after you arrive… if this happened 10 times already you know what I am talking about… they will never rush you outside as this is very impolite for them … you are the one who should leave :slight_smile:

We don’t usually eat out as it’s too difficult for a vegetarian and a vegan, not worth paying good money for a few veg floating in coloured water but we are going for an Indian with (English) friends next week and would try (!) to meet at the time specified.
Haven’t been invited for aperos/meals with les francais yet.
OH don’t like to drink either, which people seem to take as a challenge. One of said friends is always trying to get him drunk!

Wish I had more friends like that Val, be pleased to take up the challenge, as long as the friend has something palatable to offer. :wink:

I think you will find that that type of drunk culture is much more prevalent among British than French people. Obvious drunkenness is considered a bit pathetic and infra dig here rather than funny as it often seems to be in the UK.

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@Teapot I drink very little, and although I will eat organic, free range meat if somebody puts it in front of me I won’t willingly eat factory stuff. OH won’t eat any meat at all. And we manage. Both not drinking alcohol and not eating meat are becoming more common in France now.

Although local restaurants are pretty rubbish in terms of menus that suit us we eat out for the social pleasure of it. As for home dining, we’ve found our french friends are quite open to this, as long as they remember that is and we don’t end up as we did once with a wonderful meal of carrots Vichy. These days tho’ our friends’ feelings are more important to us, so if they’ve forgotten we just eat as much as we can of what’s put in front of us and try to smile.

I think the companions of a drunk are more likely to laugh out of embarrassment and discomfort than because the behaviour is funny, Véro. The boundary between ‘amusing’ drunk and ‘ugly’ drunk is easily crossed, and makes bystanders or observers anxious, as it may precede aggression or violence.

A common phenomenon in children and young adults under threat, hence “Take that smirk off your face, or I’ll give you something to smile about!” :persevere::worried:

That should have said “OH doesn’t like …” - slip of the fingers, not bad grammar! I should read what I’ve written before I post it!

I would have thought that it was impossible to get anyone who doesn’t like to drink drunk. If he’s not drinking alcohol what do they do?

It is only among British people I have heard ‘hilarious’ stories of drunken exploits, tales of public puking/peeing/etc, seen young and older people staggering about outside pubs being encouraged by their friends etc etc etc a friend of mine who is a journalist for ITV did a whole thing about street drunkenness in the UK a few years ago, it really isn’t the same here.

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I agree Vero and I think it’s because in France children see their parents having a glass of wine with a meal at the table. They see alcohol as no big deal, it’s part of the civilised mealtime. When a little older they are given a small glass diluted with water and there is no ‘mystery’ surrounding it.
I have been to many social events in France including weddings, baptems and funerals and I have never seen anyone drunk and behaving boorishly.
I have also attended, in the UK, the ‘hatches, matches and dispatches’ do’s and every one of them has ended in boorish behaviour, aggresion and in some cases fights !
I have seen a couple of documentaries about street drunkeness and it’s appaling to see young men and women falling over drunk and throwing up while their’ friends’ laugh. If this is their idea of a good evening out then they can shove it.
I also don’t understand how they can afford to do this on a regular basis.
Thank goodness I live in a civilised country.

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French friends tell me it is polite to give the hosts time to do those little thingsthat are still to do at the appointed time. It is inconsiderate to arrive on time . I have found it easier to go native though l prefer the British custom.

There is late… and too late… recently, folk have been complaining about the delay in actually getting to sit down and eat at public meals… whether they be daytime or evening affairs… it has been getting out of hand… and was deterring some folk from subscribing…

So now, the timing is made clear: SdF doors open at ** heure (giving time to pay the entrance fee, chat and/or have a few aperos) and the meal will commence at ** heure. As the cooking is done on-site this is much appreciated by the caterers as well… :relaxed:

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The British custom in my experience is that invitations are invariably “at seven thirty for eight” or “8 for 8.30” so you turn up any time after the first time mentioned knowing you dine or whatever at the second time sharp.

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That always works well. Regarding drunkenness. I live in a large village/ small town in the UK and have spent time in various Frenc cities. Nowhere in France have I experienced the drunkenness/ nuisance levels of the UK

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I’m new here in France so I have not had the opportunity to be invited out or invited anyone to my home. When I lived in the U S we often had friends over for dinner and drinks.
If I invited someone for dinner and they where half an hour late I would not bother inviting them again. Ten minutes would be ok.
If I invite you to come at 7 o’clock then I mean 7 o’clock not whatever damn time you want to turn up at. People should say what they mean and mean what they say. Life is very simple!!

You will have to learn to live at the French timescale Kevin, or you’re going to get mad :wink:

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I’m with Babeth on this. Live in France, live with French culture.

We were invited for a Sunday lunch this weekend, invited “to arrive whenever we wanted in the morning”. We interpreted that as arrive “just before 12”, which we did and was roughly right as we were not the first to arrive, nor the last. We started eating at 2pm.

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