Prepare for a solitary life Kevin, with your attitude, you aren’t going to have a lot of invitations, or guests to get upset about 
Over time, I have seen that not every French person is happy, when folk take things too far… it all depends on what is planned and how flexible things can be.
Ours is a multi-cultural area… still many more French than others… but we are all taking onboard each other’s cultural oddities. When we invite folk to eat with us… they chuckle “so British”… but they do come on time (as requested, give or take 15 mins) … and enjoy themselves and, yes, we do get invited back… 
Dutch friends often state the time of start and finish … and are sometimes adamant… arrive at ***… (although the finish can sometimes extend… depending…)
British friends may say something along the lines of… come about 6 and we’ll eat at 7…
Frankly, when we receive an invite to eat (from whoever)… I always check timings… especially important in the evenings due to OH’s medical bits and bobs… Folk do understand… and, in fact, more of them are getting medical bits and bobs themselves… 
Life is not the same for everyone, everywhere… it’s all an experience !
Vive la difference 
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Down here it’s called l’heure lozérienne. Nothing ever starts on time so you get into the habit of turning up late. Which can be a bit embarrassing on the rare occasions when something actually starts when it’s supposed to.
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So if you were to invite someone for dinner and you wanted them to arrive at 7 for drinks before eating at 7.45/8 pm. What time would you invite them for.
If you make a dinner reservation for 8pm would your table still be available an hour later if you showed up late?
I thinks it’s interesting that I’m apparently going to be very lonely here because of my bad attitude yet the very title of this thread is asking if one should be on time or not for a dinner party.
As Stella said she always checks timings. I would ask a host what time they want me there and that would be the time I would arrive. If I was going to be late I would call and let the host know.
To the best of my knowledge I have never not been invited to somewhere because I am punctual.
I agree with your sentiments… but you are risking life and limb calling me “Stell”… I’ll let you off this once, putting it down to a slip of the keyboard… but… you have been warned … 
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I think punctuality is very much a northern hemisphere preoccupation, the further north, the more concern it generates.
Certainly, in sub-Saharan Africa it has no generally accepted meaning, and resists one-sided imposition, which is seen as disrespectful and even deeply offensive in the wider society.
Socially, if people ‘visit’ (even this is a strange notion in Africa) food will always be prepared for them, without question, even if the at-homes have just finished a meal. An invitation to a meal could be seen as distinctly odd, like inviting someone to have a shower, or a hair cut.
Cultures are varied, there can be no one-size-fits-all practise that is better than another. But fitting in with local manners is of course a matter of choice, and of consequences.
I’m on my iPhone and I can guarantee you my intentions was not to call you Stell. Unfortunately in typing I missed the key and I hadn’t realized it until after I had posted. My sincere apologies.
I suggest you do not put in names… if you unable to spell them correctly… that way you might avoid offending…
If you are making the invitation then it’s entirely up to you, and making it clear exactly what the plan is a sensible and sound suggestion. But what was under discussion was more about how to interpret local customs when the invitation isn’t coming from you.
And yes, straightforward approach would be to ask, but that can put people on the spot and be misinterpreted as rather brusque. So instead you often have to feeel your way… (as yes of course people would be on time for a restaurant booking!)
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Jane… I cannot see how it can be “misinterpreted as rather brusque” to ask for clarification about times when receiving an invitation… seems like common sense to me, if one is unsure how things will pan out.
Being “foreign” helps us through all sorts of stuff… a pleasant smile, a murmured question… why would anybody take offence ??
Being brusque doesn’t automatically mean people take offence, and I didn’t suggest asking would be considered offensive. Perhaps naive or unrefined might be a better word.Personally I prefer not to trade on being foreign except as a last resort, it depends how you wish to be perceived.
As an aside, and absolutely nothing to do with this subject, we have an acquaintance who asks the most offensive questions “in a murmer and with a pleasant smile”. So it is a phrase that makes me shudder as some things remain rude no matter how much saccharine you pile on them. Nothing to do with you I realise, but I still wince.
I’ve got the advantage to be french, but when I arrived in Brittany, it took me a bit of time to get use to the local customs. My main behavior was “wait and see” and adapt myself. This doesn’t mean that I don’t now have a say if I have to express a point of view or have my own rules (as long as it doesn’t offend anyone). In any case, I wouldn’t have arrive here and rule Brittany, we don’t like never ending aperitifs, so we just don’t often go. We are well accepted here now, and the relations we have with people are respectfull and sincere.
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Ha ha… well, it takes all sorts… sometimes the best insults are delivered in a seemingly caring manner… 
(not that I would do that myself… )
Thankfully I am fully integrated in my commune and count the 500+ residents as friends… they know they can rely on my smile… 
“brusque, naive, unrefined”… or whatever… I cannot believe that anyone would think along those lines… simply because a person asks for clarification of an invitation…
It is not the timing of turning up that gets us, but the inordinate wait for the meal to be served.
They can talk for ages over a few olives and crisps and we, who normally eat at lunchtime, are becoming increasingly starving hungry.
If we are inviting retired folk , like us, we normally make it a lunchtime meal.
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Yes Jane agree, we eat about 8 p.m., and find it a bit ‘tough’, hanging around 'til often 10 for some grub 
I enjoy my naive unrefined brusqueness. It helps me show up at the appropriate time.
It appears to me, having reread this thread that there is no one correct answer as to what is the correct time to show up for a dinner party. Everybody has their own interpretation of what is appropriate In fact if you are invited at 8 there’s nothing worse than showing up at 8 ( other than quarter till) to some people.
So please, if I invite you to a bbq at 2pm and you show up empty handed 2.15 to 2.30 is appropriate. If you bring a couple of beers 2.30 to 2.45. If you bring a case of American style IPA (Lagunitas, Revolution, Goose Island) you can show up when you like and sit next to me.
But at a dinner party I expect people to be on time.
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We like to be punctual as it’s just the way we are but don’t care if people turn up late to ours, one couple who we see regularly are never on time and we make allowances for them when cooking, life’s too short to make a fuss.
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Nah
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