Drink driving at Xmas

Something to think about before you drinks and drives this Xmas. With the Holidays upon us I would like to share a personal experience with my friends about drinking and driving.

As you may know some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a “social session” out with friends. Well two days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit. That’s when I did something that I’ve never done before - I took a cab home.

Sure enough on the way home there was a police road block but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident. This was a real surprise as I had never driven a cab before, I don’t know where I got it and now that it’s in my garage I don’t know what to do with it.

Right, that's it, silly old drunkard out of our chimneys! Bah humbug! Whoops, wrong post ;-)

One of my Breton neighbours came in to use my telephone last week as his portable had died. He was reeking of booze - this was 9.30am - he called his work to say his car had broken down and he couldn't go in. All I could think was - thank goodness his car had broken down because he certainly shouldn't have been on the road in charge of anything.

I had a gastric bypass last year and now have a very low tolerance to alcohol - I'm a very cheap date now! The surgeon told me that he wouldn't operate on people who drank regularly as alcohol has such a dramatic effect when you are not absorbing all the food you eat.

I go to an English for les Francais class once a week to help with pronounciation and last Tuesday, being the final lesson before christmas we had a bit of a 'do'. Various cakes and champagne were on the menu but I had driven to the class and declined the champagne, taking an orange juice instead, when I was asked why, I explained that I follow a rule - no alchohol if I am driving, and especially when I am driving the RHD 4x4 which always catches the eye of the men in blue, they all laughed and gave the gallic shrug at my 'oddness', but we spent a very enjoyable afternoon putting the world to rights, with everyone else drinking several glasses of champagne and with the exception of the Prof who had cycled there, they were all going to drive back home. One of the ladies said that champagne wasn't alchohol and one of the men, a retired gendarme was banking on the fact that if he got stopped on the way home, it would be by a buddy. I am going to take a christmas pudding to the Prof later today and I am hoping that I am not going to hear that she fell off her vello on the way home! Vive la difference!

Moderation in extremity as an old friend says, having once been picked up very inebriated, not driving but herding his sheep along a fairly busy road. Firstly, the cops did not know what to do for lack of another shepherd around and no idea of where to put the sheep anyway and secondly, the doc who tested him had the bloke rushed into hospital for fear he would be dead of alcoholic poisoning within a few hours. What the outcome was, was that he did more of the same next day and was not caught and the police forgot to press charges somehow. I slightly suspect that when he finally does go to the big brewery in the sky, whoever does the post mortem will only find very pickled organs and so on. For all of that, he uses a the moderation in extremity expression (in his view) justifiably because he only drinks beer - nothing harmful like wine or spirits!

Too right, but then again I had a short lived marriage to a Norwegian and they make the English women look like mere beginners! My Swiss choice is OK, keeps apace with me which is not saying a lot anyway.

Last night I had a very small punch and about a glass of wine at the judo club do. Several 'occifers' (as in 'good evening occifer, have not be drinking hic...) were long gone and lost, got in cars and drove home. I though, if they can do it, so can I. Difference I was legal. Other difference, I had a fraction as much fun. Swings and roundabouts, heh?