Come on, I don’t believe You All, have never made a ‘cock up’ of something 
No really a cock-up but a language mistake, whilst on a house-hunting trip many years we were looking for somewhere to eat one evening and spotted a pizza restaurant that we weren’t quite sure was open as it was early. I thought I said ‘is the restaurant open’ to the owner but apparently I asked if it was on fire.
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Trying to think, what you said Tim? So I don’t do the same 
En feu vs ouvert, not that far apart actually so I suspect I could easily make the same mistake in pronunciation.
Well, I’m gobsmacked, wot a lot of faux pasless folks we have on here, 'mazed. 
Some of us have already “owned-up”… 
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I can remember going to a “posh” French restaurant, in Dover I think, with my Dad when I was about 12 and had been learning French for a year or so at school. The idea was to practice my French and I did great right up to the cheese course when I asked for ‘fromage de cheval’ instead of ‘fromage de chevre’. Everybody laughed except me, of course, as I was mortified. Never made that mistake again.
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very good Stella!
Do take a look at the rest of the Thread… it carried some lovely stories… It’s nice to know we can all make “fools” of ourselves from time to time…and folk generally react with great kindness… 
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Well on an early visit to France in my 20s I remember tu-toi’ing by mistake middle aged man I encountered and wanted to ask directions. He responded with enthusiasm by giving me a very hearty embrace… needless to say that was actually very useful as I’ve been much more careful to get it right ever since.
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Oh I don’t know about that, I have already asked a man what sex his wife was…
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Well, 
can never take things for granted now.
Babeth was describing, how She had a squiddle, scratching at her office door.
She was seriously upset, when I was too thick to understand, what She was ‘on about’.
Turned out, it was actually, a Squirrel, scratching, pleased when we sorted that bit of the ‘language barrier’ out
Many moons ago, out for a drink with a girlfriend, in my first motor, a Morris 1000 van, came out of the pub, a bit ‘preoccupied’, opened van, ushered in ‘chum’, off down the road, She reached under the parcel shelf, pulled out a book, “Didn’t know you were into this highbrow stuff Bill”,
“Wott Stuff?”, quick glance, quick glance around, Oh my G !!!
Back to the car park, out, lock it up, into my identical Van, GO!!!
But the key fitted, security, wasn’t the priority it is now
One of my good friends had a similar experience. He’d borrowed an elderly Mercedes for a day to visit his parents. He stopped to buy some flowers and when he unlocked and got into the car he was surprised to find that it was an automatic when he was sure it had been a manual. At that moment a man tapped on the side window and pointed at a similar car behind. My friend was embarrassed and rushed off leaving his jacket, wallet, passport and the flowers in the car. He spent the day with his parents cancelling his credit cards. The owner of the other car handed all his belongings into the local police station and my friend was reunited with his cancelled cards the following day.
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Sorry, but can’t resist !
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Yesterday, outside the local Utile, I spotted the young bearded chap who had tapped on my window earlier in the week to show me a moribund hedgehog lying on a plastic dustpan he was holding. I recognised the racing bike he was astride, so I greeted him. He looked mystified, so I said “Do you remember me…?” and detailed our odd encounter. I told him the hedgehog had died. He then told me I was mistaking him for Jimmy, who sometimes borrowed his bike. We were shortly joined by Jimmy himself. Both blokes were young, lean and bearded. Jimmy greeted me warmly and I broke the news of the creature’s decease. Jimmy’s friend asked if I had eaten the hérisson, which made good eating. I told him that, as the hérisson was clearly ill, and not knowing what maladie afflicted it, I had not tasted its dubious flesh. Jimmy was in full agreement with that. We parted on cheerful terms. I doubt such a curious event would have been available to me if I still lived in suburban Essex.
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It’s actually a known fact that the French find it difficult to pronounce the word squirrel, I have some great fun with that word lol lol 