My husband asks me to floor the accelerator, as we approach the garage 
There is a DEKRA, in fact my insco GMF will spot me a few euros there, but when I look at the Google reviews for the local one, it’s relatively bad (4.3) with comments like ‘picky’ and ‘in my opinion they refuse a lot of vehicles so that people come back to do the counter-inspection at their place for a maximum of money’ . Autosur seems like a more humane place in this city. I would imagine this is a pretty local thing since the rules are the rules.
Exactly; I bought this car from a garagiste and probably overpaid a bit but I thought they would take care of me a bit when I returned for service eventually.
Let’s just say that I was underwhelmed. No serious complaints with the car over the warranty period, but when I changed the oil (myself) about 9 months in I noticed that the coolant was about a litre low. I looked around as best I could for the leak but could not see anything so I brought it to them to fix. They replaced the thermostat , which on this car is a block on the side of the engine just above the oil filter. Cost almost 250 euros and 2 weeks off the road. Didn’t really fix the coolant consumption. I changed the cap and that seems to have almost stopped it.
But the worst thing is that when I went back last week to change the oil and filter (myself) I noticed that these cowboys put a deep gouge in the plastic oil filter cap (that sees oil pressure of about "3 bar or so). It has been like that for almost a year now and I could not see it until I removed all the air ducting to do another change. Now I really should replace that stupid cap that they ruined because it could eventually blow and leave me stranded.
I also pulled a wheel cover off at the same time and saw that whoever balanced that particular wheel did not firmly clamp the weight on the steel wheel. It was loose and only held in place by centrifugal force and the wheel cover. I tightened it and clamped it where it seemed to have worn the paint off the wheel- seems OK.
I am sure there are garages that know how to do things right, but I just don’t feel like experimenting.
We are all entitled to our opinions 
You possibly are unaware that one can re-take the CT at any Testing Station, not just the one which did the original CT, and that costs for the re-test can vary as these are set by the Testing Station itself.
eg: Many CT places do not charge to re-test for minor infringements
If the CT man refuses to “pass” your vehicle, you can choose where to get it re-tested within the following 2 months.
best of luck
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The only time I have felt aggrieved by a failure was after a man reversed into my car and left a slight dent in the body above the rear wheel. This had happened shortly after the previous test and thus, after minor corrections, had been without incident for many thousands of kilometres, but the young inexperienced tester alleged that it could cause the tyre to blow. I am sure his boss, the man I have dealt with for 26 years, would have had no problem with it. I always heave a sigh of relief when I see it is him climbing behind my wheel. 
But I also know that it is something serious if it is him who fails it, and am sure that it is justified and needs correction.
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What is most important to me, and I don’t really know how to find it in advance, is a CT place where I can have some sort of dialog with the test guy. Since my French is pretty bad, (though my auto acumen is pretty good) that could be a problem.
They give you a written report of both faults requiring another visit as well as minor things that don’t need a visit but are really handy to know and fix. Hubby does all our mechanics and finds it really useful, for example my last visit said to change the brake pads in 5-10,000 km as well as some cover thing underneath that is starting to crack. Much easier for him to see all that stuff when car up on a lift and good for J to add things to his to do llist!
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I don’t know where you are living, but perhaps you can ask a neighbour, colleague, someone… to either be with you or to recommend an English speaking CT tester.
On the other hand, as you know about cars you might well find there is no real difficulty.. 
A Vehicle Picture Dictionary with French/English is very useful…
or even just good pictures (which you’ll easily recognise) and the French words which will help you learn
EDIT. you could always ask face to face at your local Testing station, you’ll soon guage what difficulty (if any) there might be.