Hi Chaps
you may or may not have noticed that I've been absent from SFN for a couple of months and that's because my circumstances have somewhat changed.
We were intending to move to our house in France in February but my mum has been ill since October and then in December had a major stroke and so it's all up in the air. She is still in hospital at the moment and will be there for at least another two months and of course we are all totally devastated.
I am speaking to the social services, benefits, occupational health people over here to sort out what happens when she is ready to come out of hospital. She use to live on her own but will now come to live with us.
My question to you is - does anyone know of any help and assistance there might be in france. Also if she gets the attendance allowance benefit would she be able to bring it with her to france - obviously we would want to move there still I would need to bring her with me - and so it's just so totally confusing right now - but I see france slipping away - for now at least.
Any help or advise, even if it's point blank - i.e. 'no help here' - would be appreciated as I need to know the facts. She will need 24 hr care - so our original plan of running the B &B is slipping away as well, as she will need the downstairs room with bathroom so there will be less rooms to hire and I will obviously be caring for her....
anyway - Happy New Year to everyone. Hope you all had a good one.
cheers
Christine
Hi Jane and everyone - the original post was in Jan 2013 so a year ago... and a lot has happened in the year. As a result of mum we didn't move to france totally - but spent months in both France and UK... Mum has now settled into a Wardened Controlled apt near to her friends and my brothers and is happy. We, as a result, are happy... We are now moving there lock stock and barrel on 8th March and mum will come over to visit as often as friends/family bring her - which won't be a problem.
thanks for your thoughts and good wishes.
Christine
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Hi Christine, I am so sorry that this has happened.
With regard to benefits, at the moment they are transferable, but that is because we are in the EU.
This present government seems hell bent on a track to take away any benefits from UK pensioners living in the EU, so with the future referendum in the offing, if you would be needing those benefits, perhaps now is not the time to move to France with a mother needing such a lot of care, both financial and personal.
It is harder than you think moving to France even without all the extra problems you now have. It also very much depends upon where you are coming to live. Rural France is not well served with doctors in some areas and I would advise making contact with the social services in your area to see what they can provide.
Also, I would take advice from the medical professionals, as moving someone who has had such a severe stroke away from familiar surroundings may just be too much for them to take on.
This is a severe blow for you and I commend your wishing to take care for your mother and can only hope for the best outcome for you all.
Hi Shirley - thanks for info. Her problems are more Physical than Neural.. but my original post was posted just about a year ago - and she then she has improved alot. She is not moving to France - but is in Wardened Accommodation near by where she has lived for the past 65 years (since she moved from Ireland when she was a young woman. She is grand thanks. Friends and my brother will bring her across to me several times throughout the year - so everything has worked out OK. Thanks for your support tho. Christine
It's what I kind of expected Brian to be honest. The only thing that will help me is if she is allowed to keep the benefits if we do move and bring her to france - I'll do the caring just need the financial support to support her....
It a horrid thing to happen to anyone.
Cheers
Christine
Here we have a sort of home help who visits six days a week. Several days it is Cathie, who used to be a neighbour, and we know from chatting with her that she has a dozen or so people to visit every day. She visits a couple just under 1km away where the husband has had several strokes and requires a lot of care, but she only has a slot for preparing them meals that they can reheat. The same with the lady who used to live here, a few hundred metres away who is simply very old and quite physically limited and her son getting on as well - they get half an hour a day for food preparation and a couple of simple cleaning tasks. I don't actually know what provision there is overall but having had nurses visit to do dressings myself with 10 minute slots for each visit on their rounds and what it looks like as described above, I am not sure there is the measure of care you might need. Most things here are put in the hands of family. Where there is no other family, as in the two examples, I think the going is quite tough.
My father in law in Switzerland has had several strokes, recovered physically but needs constant attention or else forgets to eat, go to bed, etc. So lots of sympathy at the very least and wish what I was passing on was more helpful and in your favour.
Thanks Sheila. it's appreciated xx
Dear Christine, I am sorry that I cannot offer any advice but want to send you and your mum best wishes. xx