Give him special food with, I don't know, many extra chillies or something (reward for inflammatory speech). Or a big wodge of duct tape may help.
Depends on the people, and their respect levels. My OH has a brother in law who comes to our house, and openly airs his staunch homophobic views. Which is fine, that's his opinion, and he is entitled to it, only he opts to sleep in a gay couple's house, eats our food, uses our car.Never washes a dish or cup after himself, and never strips the bed before leaving.
Without a word of thanks
just homophobic comments.
I LOVE having my friends to stay, they are lovely and wouldn't ever do anything irritating & just muck in with everything. The only ghastly guests I have had were ages & ages ago: my sister-in-law and her family who did all the things I put as no-nos and many many more, treated my house as a hotel & me & our au pair as serfs, complained ALL the time & expected to be waited upon hand and foot even more than they already were & bitched about me the whole time to our lovely au pair until OLAP told her to put a sock in it (because s-i-l didn't actually speak to me at all except to say "We won't eat xyz", or "The pool's too deep" or "why haven't you got spare wellies my children's size"). SO glad she is now EX s-i-l & will never darken my doorstep again!
Most of the time we love folks coming to stay, and with one exception, most folks muck in and are great funâŚ
Does anyone here actually like people coming to stay ?
I don't have "rules", I have "my ways", which are clear and set in stone.
When I want to eat, I eat, whether or not you've planned a family dinner two hours before, or after me wanting to eat.
I eat what I like to eat, so cooking me a surprise bowl of lentilsto go with a fillet of sea bream will no go down well, to save yourself the embarassment, when coooking for "the house", count me out.
I will need the bathroom for the half an hour before I go to work, if you are in there during this time, you better have a good excuse, and forward booked a hotel for the following night/stay. There will also be grumbling.
If you ask me to "take you on a hike".... don't get halfway up the hill, after twenty minutes, and complain that you are hot/cold/hungry/dirty/forgot your water/wore the wrong shoes..... because we're finishing this goddamn hike.
In winter,i will NOT help you chain,dechain your tyres, nor will I dig the snow off your car. I have a life, and am not on holiday like you.
There are more, but I can only think of them when the in laws come.
Good job you've only a little place Steve, otherwise we'd all be along to visit. Sounds like a right fun place ;-)
I am not a taxi, I don't do sightseeing tours and my dogs live here, and please only put the paper provided down the loo!!!
Gee wizz Liz - how can people be sooo stupid and at the very same time sooo inconsiderable, your husband could have died for goodness sake! I would love to see if the situation was turned 180 degrees how would they have reacted?
Glad to say that so far, we have just opened of a small (2 rooms) B&B in (13), that old fiends understand, that we are running a business, like some that has just stayed with us. As they simply cannot sleep in the same bed, they had to pay their way... (we give 10% discount to family and friends - as I now do not earn any money...where as most of them still have a monthly secured income)...ie in one of our B&B rooms, else they could have stayed for free in one of 'our' bedrooms! They have always paid their way, being helpful and the rest! They have always rented a car, though we have used ours the most, but then we/I know where we're going! There has been no need for TGV/airport pick-up, which I always say. If people come as a couple, then it gives them the freedom and us as well, to do what we want to do, when we want to it, but would always be happy to collect and return to TGV/airport if just one person comes to visit, but I would still expect her/him to chip in with petrol/food etc...it really isn't rocket science...
One a very different note, have just come back from the little, but very lovely market in Cucuron (84), which I like to visit on market day, but also other days in the week just for a coffee and bringing my own croissant! Full of tourists (I used to be one of them, I do not forget that), but today were two English families with 5 kids between them aged c4-7. Were the kids running a racket or were they running a racket, and parents just not paying any attention at all, including to the 2 little ones staning on top of the surround to the etang, and very close to taking a major dip in! No reactions whatsoever, sooo busy talking to each other despite the VERY loud high pitched voices, but hey, I guess this is what they are used to! Sorry got complete side tracked here... ;) PS! Where are you? :)
Two years ago I arranged a party for our 30th wedding anniversary, and one set of friends asked if they could stay on as it would cost them quite alot to come and with 2 small children, that would be their only holiday. We agreed, then less than a fornight before party hubby is rushed into hospital with a heart attack and is diagnosed with a tumour that needs urgent surgery, party cancelledâŚsaid friends made me feel guilty for cancelling as they had âno moneyâ against my better judgement, I agreed that as long as they amused themselves and understood there was a no alcohol rule in force at home they could still come. What a nightmare, they expected to be entertained, refused to go out, complained bitterly about the meals I was serving, about not being able to drink on their holiday, told hubby his lifestyle had caused his heart attack and opened a bottle of wine in front of him, then complained when I flipped outâŚneedless to say we havenât seen the, since!
We share expenses - food, drinks, petrol
Here are some rules we do not send to our guests. They are wishful thinking in the main!
FISH AND GUESTS GO OFF AFTER THREE DAYS
There has been a great deal of internet chatter over here on forums for ex-pats (or should that be fora?), about the behaviour of guests. Let me say here and now, for the avoidance of any doubt, that we have not suffered from any of this but there is evidence in plenty of those who have. This also does not apply to people renting gites that have paid for the privilege.
A misconception is that we, who live here, are lonely and miss the company of fellow Brits. Even taking into account the number of Brits who now live in France and the many chances there are to meet them, we have chosen this life because we like it and perhaps, after a life of âbeing involvedâ we are happy to be on our own.
We start with the very worst type of âpopperâ This is one who calls in because they âhappen to be passingâ, who just arrives at the front door and says âWe happen to be passing and thought we would drop by and could we stay a couple of nights?â This is unforgivable and assumes that your âhostsâ do nothing with their lives other than sitting around waiting for you to arrive. I know one person living over here who used to keep a suitcase by the front door so that, in the event of an unexpected arrival, they could say âsorry but we are going away today for a weeks holiday â what a pity we did not know you were coming.â
RULE ONE: Do not just arrive. Wait to be invited, even invite yourselves but be sure that your stay is expected, anticipated with pleasure, and limited in extent.
Arriving down to breakfast, late, and sitting at the table waiting to be served (as has been reported) is not the way to behave. Your hosts are not on holiday, they have lives of their own and some may even be working, so consider them. You are not staying in a hotel but with friends. Help and be involved.
RULE TWO: Fit in with your hosts lifestyle and timetable â do not expect them to change their routine for you.
Some âguestsâ expect to be picked up from the airport and returned there after their holiday. This not only takes your host hours of travelling (remember they have to come and collect you and get back home after dropping you off), but which can also cost a lot of money in fuel and parking.
RULE THREE: If being picked up from an airport or railway station, at least offer to pay for the parking and the fuel. Better still, why not hire a car yourselves so that your hosts are not inconvenienced and you can have independence while staying at their home.
Most people, who live here, in France, have been to the adjacent tourist sites many times and may not wish to go again. They also may not have the time. So, be independent, go out under your own steam but be clear where you are going and what time you will be back. There is nothing worse than your hosts preparing a meal and then finding that you are late back because you could not tear yourself away from the beach.
RULE FOUR: Do not expect your hosts to act as tour guides. If you have hired a car then you can do what you want when you want. It may be that you can borrow your hostsâ car but if so, be prepared to pay the insurance excess and be aware of what to do in the event of an accident.
Your holiday home is your hostâs home. They may be very happy to cook meals for you; however it would be a nice gesture if you offered to cook alternative meals yourselves. Clear the table, fill the dishwasher do not leave your hosts to do it while you sit out and enjoy the weather.
RULE FIVE: you are staying in a friendâs house â not a hotel. Do not expect a hotel service.
Do not expect a free holiday. Do not be like the person who came to stay, offered nothing financially in return, did not even take their hosts out to dinner, and then demand payment for something you brought over for them from the UK. Remember that many who live here came out when the Euro was above 1.40 and now, with probably the same sterling income, your hosts are only getting 1.20 or thereabouts. One idea would be to volunteer to set up a kitty to cover the costs of your stay and keep it topped up.
RULE SIX: Offer to pay for a shopping expedition, take your hosts out for a meal at least once a week. Offer to contribute to fuel if you do get taken out for the day. A free holiday is one thing but a holiday that costs your hosts a lot of money is unlikely to be repeated.
Listen to your hosts. Life in France is very different to that in the U.K. If you wish to go to a market, remember that they start at 0800 and finish at noon. It is no good arriving down at 10:30, having a lazy breakfast and then deciding to go to a market at 1100 as it will be closing. Restaurants often are not open for new diners after 1330 so do not always expect a meal to be served if you arrive late. Restaurants are usually closed on Sunday evenings and Mondays â not a good time to plan to go out!
RULE SEVEN: Plan your days in advance, be aware of the life style here, and do not always expect your hosts to want to go with you (markets for us are for shopping not for tourism).
Your hosts live in France but this does not necessarily mean that they have gone native. However, some folks feel the need constantly to denigrate France as a country and the French as a people. Your hosts will have a different view, accepting that there are good and bad things about the French and living in France. They know, they live there, you do not.
RULE EIGHT: - Leave your anti French prejudices at home!
When staying for a few days, there will be the need to wash some clothes. It is not a good idea to put your dirty stuff in the hostâs laundry basket and expect it to be done for you.
RULE NINE: - Ask your host if you may use the washing machine. They will probably offer to do your washing with their own anyway.
The kitchen can be an area of the most stress. Many people feel that the kitchen is their âzoneâ and dislike others trespassing in it, however, when your hosts are cooking for their guests, help with such things as vegetable preparation may well be welcomed. Offer and, if the offer is accepted, do it.
RULE TEN: - Do not invade your hostsâ space unless invited (and that includes the bathroom). Offer to help and even offer to cook a meal or two during your stay so as to give your host an evening off out of the kitchen. Offer to fill the washing up machine but not to empty it â things put back in the wrong place can be an irritant!
Welcome to our "OOL" you'll notice ther is no "P" in it, let's keep it that way!
Oh yes sun cream, How about asking if they use one type that seems not to stain (awaiting feedback) and isn't horrendously gloopy. AMBRE SOLAIRE DRY MIST SPRAY or the later newer formulation of P20 (the old one could stain pools and towels/sheets etc, not sure about the new one.
No Yorkshire Teabags = No Entry!
Please pay your way, thankfully most visitors do without being asked;
Tidy up after you, make your own bed etc. Offers of washing up are seldom refused as are tea/coffee making.
Should you not like cats (only two) they will make it clear that you are unwelcome.
Been "used" before, several times...
Now, however, regular visitors couldn't be nicer, or more generous, or more respectful. A refreshing change.
We have had the sun cream problem with the pool. We have two fair haired grandsons and my daughter covers them in cream!!
I put this comment on under Steve Yates and it has appeared here.
Whole heartedly agree with this one.
We do not do airport transfers, but will pick up from Macon. If they want to go out for days, they will need a car as we live in the heart of the country.
I just expect friends to be fair....Life is give and take....and a true
friend follows these rules.
When invited for lunch or dinner.
It is polite to arrive at a friend`s house with a small gesture of appreciation...
a bottle of wine is usual but I have received lots of interesting gifts...
A few months back it was a half size tin of Heinz baked beans and a cutting
of a weed? with its leaves half eaten and that was sitting in a brown plastIc
container ....not even tucked in.
Bazaar, contrary Mary Mary but certainly mean and ignorant.
Would I not notice and would I address that....oh yes, of course.
Rules are v simple, they are exactly the ones I apply to everyone anyway. Don't do anything that will irritate someone else (ie me!!) ie do hang up towels after swimming, don't take bathroom towels to the pool, clear up your own mess as you go along, don't coat yourself in sun-cream & go in the pool (don't go in the sun between 11 and 3.30 and you won't need sun-cream anyway) do eat what appears on the table without complaining etc etc
If my visitors at some stage want to go & do a shop for the house they are more than welcome ;-)
Visitors don't make much of a difference anyway as there are 7 of us when it's just us.
Bring your own transport ! We are 15 mins from nearest station and there is no regular bus service.