Your jokes are good and original, the parts that are good are not original and the parts that are original are not good 
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Hope thatâs a joke - as an academic, plagiarism is almost the worst thing one can do!
Homage
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The act of going home.
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Reminds me of those âfunnyâ definitions: countryside = shooting Piers Morgan.
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I got my anniversary badge and my reader badge. Nothing will top that supposing the day was to last another 40 minutes.
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No doubt written in many a childâs school report 
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orâŠ
lâĂąge de chez moi !
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A love of men?
Old men?
Fill your boots. Iâm sure no one is judging.
The best news youâll read this weekend. An actor from Paisley has been cast as Montgomery Scott, aka, Scotty in Star Trek. Heâll be the first Scot to do so. But wait, thatâs not the best bit. The word âbawheidâ is to replace âturnip heidâ in the scripts. Set phasers tae malkie.
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Think that would be hommes agĂ©s, and whatâs love got to do with it?
Me no know. Iâve no idea where my train of thought went there.
You are Tina Turner in disguise and I claim my ÂŁ5. 
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I got the old jalopy out for the first time this year and it still seems to go, turn and stop as it should.
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Fixed my shaver today.
Last week I dropped it and afterward each time i tried t turn it on the light flashed red and it wouldnât work. Started taking it apart this afternoon, but hit a snag where it wouldnât separate the drive from the body so looked up a youtube video. The last thing he said was âafter replacing the batteries the light will flash red - plug it into the charger for 5 second to reset the cellsâ. Sure enough, plugging it in for a few seconds was enough, and all is well again.
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This week Mrs W. got chatting with a book club friend at the local market & somehow got around to talking about horses and riding, Mrs W. doesnât ride. Her friend has two thoroughbred Arabes, but can only ride one at a time & was looking for someone to ride with, MrW. mentioned I can ride, so after 20 years or so Iâm back in the saddle, went out for what was initially an hour, turned out to be a 2 & 1/2 hour hack, and Iâm now feeling a few muscles⊠Rdv next weekend for another outing in the saddle.
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