Was similar in my village in Portugal, poor souls 
There are houses here, with earth floors!
Fortunately they are in the minority, several of our French neighbors are immaculately dressed and their gardens certainly put ours to shame.
I have heard that said before, so it’s not just bears that …in the woods 
Thats cos youse lives in a posh bitta t’ cuntry John weart’ folks hav t’ dosh, butt, ah thinks thems t’ minoarity mebbe Jon!
It’s not all Chateau you know 
If youse refers t’ thing ont’ telle, we avent got yan, or want yan, (or a 'ot tub) but no complaints about ‘pongin’ from anyone neither jon.
Don’t be over judgemental, of folks, who are, possibly not as fortunate as us, or yourself. 
Well it’s more like going in the stables among the cows here John, at the moment we dont have bears in our woods 
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T’ reel Wurld
Thanks John
Yes please Anne, can you message me
Thanks Bill
You are absolutely right there Ann, thanks
Thank you Stella for your very practical advice, will go through all the details 
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Thank you Mark - yes, to us it is very frustrating, both being miles away in the UK, plus trying to find someone who has a teeny clue, but onward and upwards