How and what to prepare, before one dies

OK… let’s give this a go…

Make sure bank accounts are in joint names M ou Madame
and not Mr and Mrs

Make sure that the spouse is named as beneficiary of any savings or pensions…

( a French neighbour has confided in me that she has signed-up for a Funeral Plan with the local Death Squad… and named me as the person in charge of the event “arrangements” as she knows I prefer short and sweet ceremonies… and so does she :rofl: )

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Medical intervention and, hopefully, a remedy.

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Make sure you have one will each, or maybe two depending on circumstances.

  1. Make sure you know where ALL your other half’s passwords are located.

(My aunt still can’t access her late husband’s phone that contains hundreds of family photos that were not backed up anywhere).

  1. Contact and account details of any pension schemes (so that pensions can be cancelled quickly,). This hopefully avoids the painful situation arising of pension schemes demanding the clawback of pensions paid (in error) after death. Also this information enables starting the process of applying for any surviving spouse pension that may be due.

3…List of all investments/savings+ account details (to be updated periodically) to facilitate the prompt administration of an estate/release of funds asap etc.

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Check now with pension schemes whether OH beneficiary. We each have schemes where we have taken reduced benefits so OH will continue to benefit.

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Being widowed younger than most of the contributors I would add the following advice

  1. If your spouse had a business and you were included in any conjoint-collobarateur role officially with payments made to URSSAF etc as an effective partner, be aware that you will be liable for ALL oustanding debt payment the business owes even if you did not work for it. Thank heavens we never went down that route!!
  2. Get both names put on the carte grise of vehicle you own. If the deceased is the sole name and therefore seen as owner in the sucession, you have no right to that vehicle and must get it re-registered in your name WITH PERMISSION of all heirs too!
  3. Make more photocopies of the death certificate even though you get around ten free but everyone wants a copy from overseas pensions to the CPAM when you have to notify them or make claims
  4. Ask someone nearby to check on you every so often if you have no close family who can pop in regularly. Last thing anyone wants is to lay dead for weeks before being found
  5. If you have pets, find a solution for them in the event of the second or single death.
  6. Make a contact list and a folder with personal info and deposit with a Notaire or local bank branch if you use one so they have your details for sucession
  7. Talk over with your spouse/partner about their wishes - I never got that chance and had to decide what he would have liked. Also let your family know as well.
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Hi
Having been widowed 6 months ago I cannot emphasise enough how important it is to get onto all pension people asap. It took three months for my civil service widows pension to be processed which I was told it would do so didn’t mind that. I also was unaware I could apply for my old age pension to be increased and inherit part of my husbands. My daughter had a friend who told me about this. It does not happen unless you apply for it. It took 6 months but was backdated to my husbands death. Uk bank was ok but need copies and translations of death cert and wills certified in English by a notaire. I had duplicates of all passwords for everything which was an absolute life saver. It was the most important thing really. All the French authorities have been excellent I have found

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Again, death is a certainty but somehow we feel uncomfortable discussing it. As it is inevitably coming towards us anyway it seems wise to be prepared.

You’d think there would already be an MD Word template but seems not, so we preparing our own dossiers.

This may also be useful for some:

what-to-do-when-i-die-organiser.pdf (1.1 MB)

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Brilliant, thanks Susannah. I started to prepare my own and lost the will to live (that seems apt :slight_smile: ) And could not bear the thought of doing the same for OH. He has the most awful PIN number list which is totally incomprehensible - to him as well! He says it’s so that no-one will be able to get into all his accounts / etc.

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My French aunt’s husband died when she was in her late ‘80s. Shortly before he died she told me that she was going to have to go upstairs and have a conversation that she had never had with him before despite being married for almost 60 years. She didn’t know what he wanted for his funeral to be like. He was a rarely church going Catholic and the plot in the cemetery of the nearby village where his roots were was in place (it had been a wedding present from his parents) but she had no idea what he wanted as far as a service went. She returned happy. I think he had been glad to share his thoughts with her. He wanted a church service, he would like it if a lot of people attended but he wanted no singing. He hated singing at funerals. Shortly afterwards reality took over and the day came. It was in the local church. It was presided over by one of his closest friends f who had been a colleague in his Parisian legal practice for decades who later in life had become a priest. There was no singing. There were a few people from his generation but the vast majority were of my generation, representing the family and friends who, if still alive, were not fit to travel in the mid winter.
Those conversations are important.

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The most difficult thing is not to have them. My father refused to discuss this saying just put me in a bin bag, and died suddenly from an aneurysm very young. Which left my mother, my sisters and I at a loss and inevitably we argued like cats in a sack.

We did our best. Sadly couldn’t find a humanist celebrant, and the Christian person we found reneged on his promise not to mention Jesus. So the orthodox side of the family were furious, and tutted throughout. I was young and bolshy so died my hair orange and wore a punk suit, which increased the tutting level significantly. Thankfully my mother was pretty oblivious to it all.

Discuss!

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What a cheerful subject!
I respect people’s piont of view and wishes but for me, dead is dead and trying to shape people’s opinion of me post death is futile, that opinion was formed years ago.
I understand that some have ‘blended’ relationships that cause inheritance to not be as they would wish when french resident but think of the life you have enjoyed here rather than the lives of those who benefit, or not, of those you leave behind.
I suppose my attitude to death and inheritance comes from having 4 children from one marriage so whether we die in France or UK makes little difference as our UK will mirrors french inheritance laws and France cannot stake a claim to our UK properties, can they?
Having dealt with the administration of 2 UK estates neither gave a fig about where thier personal shackles could be found, it was down to me to find them, another life experience.
Some basic preparation for death is sensible but beyond that we only get one shot at life so little piont in over worrying about others lives after your death.
We are all different.

Indeed we all are… :wink:

I reckon this thread has provided some useful ideas… but not everything is applicable to everyone… of course not.

However, if just one of these ideas saves some unnecessary hassle to a bereaved person/family… I reckon it’s worthwhile. :+1:

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No but if the notaire considers children have been treated unequally the assets in France can be legally adjusted to compensate .

A rare scenario and not worth worrying overmuch unless a lot of assets and a lot of warring offspring.

Like you my succession is very straightforward as I have three children from one marriage. I do however feel that as I live in a different country to my children, in a country where they are not particularly up to speed with the language and processes after a death I need to do as much as possible to make the period immediately after my death as straightforward for them as possible. At some point I ought to get rid of some of the acquisitions I’ve made that would be far easier for me to dispose of than them.
I should probably have made the arrangements earlier because although we always hope that death will come in old age we have to face up to reality. At least three of my hobbies are considered high risk and I should probably have taken that into consideration as well. That’s the problem, we all think we are immortal.

For inheritance tax, yes, but with a credit for any UK IHT paid, up to the amount of French IHT due…if you’re a permanent French resident at death.

I’m not sure anyone has that as an aim? My reading of posts is that it about trying to be fair and share one’s assets in a way one feels comfortable with rather than being forced to do what the French administration thinks right.

I just hope the codicil will be overturned soon and we can all breathe a sigh of relief and go back to where we were.

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English friend got caught out for thousands of euros when her OH suddenly died. She had to declare ALL WORLDWIDE bank accounts he personally held for the succession and was taxed by the french fisc as they were both resident in France when he died and her afterwards.

Is carte gris possible in two names?

Photocopy of death certificate would not be acceptable, I think.

Yes. it is

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