I found the same Bob Sivell . All of our friends seemed dismayed that we were leaving the U.K. for good and although they all wished us well and many claimed they’d stay in touch very few have. We’ve had a lot to get done in the time we’ve been here & of course the dreaded B word has overshadowed all and forced us to get some things done more quickly than we might otherwise have had to. This has led to my perhaps not communicating as much as I would have hoped but I’m dumstruck by the lack of replies when I do send one of my mammoth emails . Even my sister no longer contacts me yet we used to chat (by text) almost every other day . I guess the saying “out of sight “ is true after all.
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Peter i can second your observation in another life.
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Hi I was surprised to find this question - very open and honest.
It is one which bugs me every day. I am someone who has a need to see a friend every week, even though I live with my husband with whom I share many conversations. Most of my English friends abroad respond in a very friendly way when I phone to say hello, but it is down to me to phone not only English friends in england but also most of my friends in France, exceptions of two or three.
My need to communicate overrides the nagging feeling it is more important for me to keep in touch and/or meet, then it is for the friend.
Suffering from anxiety and unable to cope very well with some of the behavior of people in terms of feeling excluded or at the receiving end of comments which make me go ‘ouch!’ and which seem to be ‘human nature’ keeping friends is a bit of a paradox which is a continuous work in progress. My recent love of painting landscapes in the countryside has calmed me down and I have become less needy. Nothing like being up a mountain sharing the view with a few sheep!
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Hi Fiona, you sound a lot like me in many ways. Yet although getting along in years (euphemism for being OLD) I recently made an interesting discovery about myself.
All through my life I thought I had the unrequited need for love, affection, friendship etc. Very recently I realised that although this was partly true it wasn’t the real me.
What I really needed was an outlet to GIVE those things.
I mentioned earlier that the stray cats in my garden have fulfilled that need, much to the annoyance of SWMBO.
You have found something in which you can give love and not receive it - your paintings. To me the discovery has led to a re-balance and focus for my life and instead of bewailing my lot to my remaining and long-suffering friends now I drive them nuts talking about my little furry friends!
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Hi Norman
I cant live without cats either! And some of the best moments are when my cat, Sundae is sitting on my lap when I am painting engrossed with the movements of the brush! Paintings dont speak to me but when I am outside as yesterday I had the company of four sheep and several chickens. as well as the birds, the insects dive bombing my painting which I am forever rescuing and a nice cup of tea with the neighbour. But I still drive my friends nuts too sometimes with endless neurosis. So I see a psychiatrist and a councillor and as if that is not enough I pray!
Le sam. 18 mai 2019 à 13:08, Norman Clark via Survive France survivefrance@discoursemail.com a écrit :
Hi Fiona, I don’t think Ihave neurosis, but during recent bad times, I often thought I had them and worse. Then I reached out to friends more than ever, and although the oldest ones were there as ever - too many of the others weren’t.
Understandable as everyone has their own lives to lead, but a bit disappointing. You pray - I talk to myself out loud admonishing my weaknesses - it does help, surprisingly. Just seems to take longer each day!
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Norman… stop admonishing your weaknesses… and concentrate on your strengths… you do have them… they may just be hiding… 
Just seen this. Living as we do in France we are of course quite far from old friends and family. You and I have lived quite a while and if you are like me you met very many people, in various life phases, then it’s nice to keep in touch. I am afraid that quite a few of my old muckers have “passed”. My own life phases were mainly boarding schools (in touch with nobody), youth in Surrey and Kent (still plenty of friends), London (ditto), Work (ditto including pro bono work), Marriage 1 (ditto but was dropped by plenty), Marriage 2 (very short due to my wife’s death but still in touch with her family), Marriage 3 (her family of course but they are very far away), my retirement in France but I have had a place here 48 years so know lots and lots of people. I have been in umpteen associations, clubs, societies etc in my life as well. I still communicate with many people in the UK, USA, Canada, Italy, New Zealand. I am now at 73 bringing up my 10 y o daughter here in France but have close family in the UK. I have seen a few Brits, especially men, slowly lose contact with their families in the UK but I do make an effort to stay in touch. However we have to realise that our young have their own lives to live and are very busy! I keep thinking itwould be nice to see more of everybody, as one starts to begin asking how much more time does one have left!
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Crikey David, I didn’t know you were in this network? I have even forgotten the name of the earlier one we used, but remember your name very well. Good to hear you are still with us!
Yes, this past year in our village has been a little sad, as we have a large proportion of oldies here, but happy to say a lot of young ones as well, so it is not a ‘dying village’ in that sense. Each year we have a Free (Gourmet) Lunch for those over65 and it is one of those times when we see who has gone, but the numbers still seem to be around the 100 mark attending, and still in good heart even if a bit creaky.
Where are you based in France? I am in the Southern edge of Correze, near Beaulieu-sur-Dordogne.
Hi Stella - hard to do with a ‘Public Recorder’ on hand to keep drawing them to my attention! My deficiencies and weaknesses I mean 
Hi Norman I think that you wre in the loop with Graham who died suddenly must be about 8 or 10 years ago. I never actually met him but we chatted frequently. I have been pretty busy helping my wife to bring up our now 10 year old daughter. She’s having her petit communion on Sunday and was equal winner of a class in a piano competition in Brest in February. We live in the Parc Natural in the Monts d’Arree in Finistere. It’s quite wild and woolly and we are at 250 metres above sea level which is called the mountains here! My wife and daughter are now French citizens. I run a small art group and am involved in associations. I rarely go back to the UK, but have family thereincluding sons and their familes and a few grandchildren. My health is generally OK except that I have heart issues and arthritis. I just had a stent put in and am about to be operated of for aortic valve replacement. I am not meant to travel at present which means I cannot go on holiday to the Philippines at the end of June to take possession of the new house my wife is in the process of buying. My house here is in the centre of the village and I know practically everybody, as I have been in and around the commune since the early 70s. It is most definitely my home now and I don’t have a house in the UK anymore, although our family has investments there. I am pretty well sure I would not wish to return there. What do you occupy yourself with?
Hi again David, sorry to hear about the health problems, and hope they all get sorted out very soon.
I have been though a pretty dificult time on assorted levels over the past ten years, none really health related - other than now being an almost 80-year Old Fart!
I now live in the South Correze, bordering on the Lot and Dordogne and Auvergne, and love the area and the village and house in which we live/share. It looks now as if the worst of the problems is over thank goodness, so I am grateful for that and also basic and undeserved good health!
Essentially I have self-published many books on my passion which can broadly be designated as ‘Old Posters’ but the books put these into Artistic and Social context in different market and other sectors. This means I have developed into a bit of a Social Historian in the process. It has been a fascinating, absorbing time, but not financially rewarding - just enough to keep me interested.
My longest and still continuing project has been ‘A History of Propaganda’ in which two-thirds has also been converted into Powerpoint Presentations and delivered on a local basis. With the current state of the world I find myself constantly revising the last third. There seem to be a whole new set of applications and lunacies being applied that have little relativity to anything that has gone before other than rampant Nationalism.
Over the past few years I have produced three small-ish books that I did self-illustrate, and which ultimately saw me produce some 160 watercolour illustrations of WW1 aircraft, tanks, armoured cars, and trucks. I then completed a 60 page set of pen and ink illustrations of Chateaux and Villages of the Lot, Dordogne and Correze. So I suppose I have been relatively busy on that front. I don’t do a lot now as a recent cataract operation, although totally successful has somehow thrown by confidence out of the window, and I am still coming to terms with that as I still don’t see in the same way as previously. Hard to explain but after a life in commercial art, I suppose its just an age thing.
Fortunately now I am able to continue to read voraciously, although I am having to look closely now at my 3,000 + hardback book library to see what to do with them. I suppose when I fall off my twig they will be disposed of, hopefully to decent homes?
In the mean time as most are historical references they are my constant companions in a relatively isolated life
I haven’t been back to the UK for over 20 years if my memory serves me, and I have no affinity whatsoever with the place. My only (and older ) brother is a Farage supporter and I find it hard to get on his wavelength, so contacts tend to be brief, and getting less frequent as time goes on.
Oh and of course, I have taken French Nationality - about two years ago. My verbal and written French are less than average - with my 60% deafness not helping the former - especially with the telephone - my sworn enemy! However I read French well, and if people have the patience to scribble a note I can generally work out what they mean. Films with French subtitles are no problem at all, and English ones are also welcome, so I get by.
Skype is also good as I can boost the sound and also in English I can do a fair amount of lip-reading, which alas I can’t do in French.
So there you have it a potted trip around the ancient Norm Clark!