Lots of abuse sadly. If you need it you will get it, but it is a hugely expensive service so something that needs to be controlled now. Previously I was eligible for taxis (but never used one) but a while back my specialist said that my state of health no longer warranted one. Since I never thought it did, and I have a partner and a car, that didn’t really bother me!
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My only need for one is not the journey itself, but the physical impossibility of lifting Fran out of the house alone, unless with a wheelchair, and unfortunately the pharmacie was closed yesterday and I will try again today.
In some ways, if you have personal transport and a driver, wife or husband, it is more convenient than waiting for a car or ambulance which may arrive within a window of time rather than when you are ready to leave.
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Frankly, David… from what you describe… you and your wife are folk who do need the medical transport/help available… please talk this through with your Doc.
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I think they replied yesterday, I had 3 missed calls, all the same number but not one I recognise as the surgery. I’ll ring again today and raise the possibility of a wheelchair ordonnance.
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As Stella has said, areas differ. But here the taxis arrive on the dot as they are taking people to appointments. They are trained in how to move people, carry first aid kit with them, and are generally caring and efficient. It is your right to have help, and I can imagine that your would hugely prefer not to need it. However the earlier you get things in place the easier it will be in the future.
Always best to get things set up before it becomes an urgent need, and to get Fran used to other people while able to process this. It sounds as if you will find it more and more difficult to move her by yourself.
So ask for a “prise en charge pour transport” as well as a wheelchair.
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I agree. I suspect David, from your life transporting rehomed dogs, you are the type of person who expects and wants to help others, rather than be helped, so it can be hard to let go of this role.
One of the worst maxims I believe is “it is better to give than to receive” - there can be no giving unless someone is willing to receive, so the joy of giving is only possible if there is a receiver. This, I believe is your moment in life to be a receiver and give others joy that they can help you and Fran. You both are more than deserving of help.
Not least it worries me when I hear you talk about abdominal pain when lifting her. Hernia? Which is very common when someone has not been trained to lift heavy weights. If you are incapacitated how will you both manage? Please, please, let others take the strain of the routine stuff, then that will give you more reserves to cope.
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I agree with all you say Jane, but the wheels of bureaucracy grind very slowly and all this is supposedly in hand as a result of the dossier I submitted to the Assistante Sociale. That took several weeks and it is several more from that visit when I received the letter saying it was in hand and they would make another rdv for a 2nd visit to decide what is needed. So we are in their hands at the moment.
However I am pretty sure that the doctor, as opposed to the AS can issue the ordonnance for the wheelchair as the previous doc did the same for her sticks and walking frame long ago. Both of those are of no use at the moment as she doesn’t have the full use of her left arm and hand.
As happened yesterday, getting through on the phone to the surgery is not straightforward. This morning once again I had 2 recorded messages to hang on then the 3rd to try later. That I will do when they’ve had their lunch. 
Still no way to get through on the phone, all lines busy, but good news is that there was another letter from the APA people to say that the dossier was complete and that someone will be contacting us to arrange a visit. I am wondering if, and hoping (because I am hopeless on the phone) that, the number they have to call is M-P’s as she will be able to sort it out easily.
Small steps. 
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David, please accept any help that is available for Fran. If your abdominal pain continues/worsens (so) circumstances may dictate the future. You need to make a RDV for yourself 
I should have read your post before posting 
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Thanks Stella, that explains a situation with someone we know. It was many years ago that this person had pleasure in telling us and others how she was able to get ambulance/medicar whenever she needed, even though she/husband were capable of driving themselves!
We believe they were so impressed with the health system, it was/is being used to the extreme!
It was about three years ago that she phoned to tell me she was refused medi transport.
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It’s a bank holiday David, so even if you got through it would be a standard answering service and unlikely to be able to speak to a doctor.
No that was yesterday Jane, I know not to try today, but the letter was retreived from my boite today as I knew there would be no delivery.
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I have given up on phoning, especially as we don’t really need a visit, just a prescription for a wheelchair. The original rdv that we had to miss was made more than 3 weeks ago after her fall, the earliest we could get. 
But today I will call in on the way back from her follow up to the emergency treatment appointment at the hospital to the surgery, even though I know there isn’t always a receptionist there. It really is a mess since the other bloke retired. Also we both have regular, still valid, ordonnances to fulfill and will use that pharmacy as our own is still closed. No idea why, there is usually an explanation on the door, holidays or whatever.
Had a real shock a few days ago. I got her up without a fuss around midday and eventually she was seated at the dinner table for our evening meal. All fine, but then at around midnight and time for bed she absolutely refused my help to rise from the chair. She kept her arms firmly at her side so I could not get mine under her armpits, by her own admission as a former care home assistant, the safest way for both of us. Her attitude was so aggressive that I fetched the camera and videoed our conversation and was shocked when I played it back (to myself) the following day. Words like ‘hate’ and ‘murder’ were used so I went to bed but a short time later, worried that she might try to rise herself and fall, returned to turn her chair close to the table and left the light on. In the morning she was awake and perfectly friendly and amenable for me to assist her to the bathroom. She said she had been awake all night but I doubt that, but at least she would only have slumped against the table rather than fall to the floor. Since then she has spent all day in bed on at least one occasion, even though agreeing to get up, and then not allowing it.
Last night we watched (but she fell asleep so I recorded it) a very shocking programme of Ed Balls working in a care home and then going out on the rounds with a home carer for his 14 hour day. Very recognisable was a scene where the wife with Alzheimers was at the breakfast table with Ed and her husband/carer. She kept pushing away the spoon offered and also a large glass of juice with a laxitive in, held by Ed Balls after the husband warned ‘don’t let go of it’. The hard glare that she gave the 2 of them was instantly recognisable by me.
Today we will set off with at least an hour to spare, I will get her down the steps in the house by placing her at the top and, standing facing her below, lift her with arms around her waist. I don’t think we could manage the 3 concrete steps where she fell like that, so will take the long way round at the other end of the terrasse where it meets the ground. But I will have to take care, it is further to travel and the uneven ground is not helpful with her shuffling gait. I am hoping that there might be a wheelchair to borrow at the hospital as it is a long way even from the entrance to the admission counter, never mind wherever we are directed to.
I know I should have booked an ambulance or taxi but I kept thinking that our local pharmacy would be open to rent one before our journey. Maybe if we leave early enough we could call and rent one on our way at the surgery pharmacy.
Well I hope the day has gone well, and you managed to get her to her appointment without problem. And that it was a productive one!
Do keep letting us know how things are going. I wonder if all is ok if you don’t post now!
Sadly Jane, no. With great difficulty I lifted her down each step, the long way round was just too uneven, but after that she only managed about 3 shuffled steps and then felt faint. We were half way to the car but I was worried that she would go down and I wouldn’t be able to get her up again, not just that but carry her.
We decided to abort the mission and head back, but getting her up the 3 steps was even harder. Then, at the further step over the threshold into the house her legs started to buckle and in desperation I half carried, half dragged her to an easy chair. I was exhausted, not just physically, and it was sometime before I could summon up the energy to make the call and cancel the appointment. The lady on the other end said the next available was the end of December and I said that I would get our neighbour to make the call later.
It is 5 weeks since she fell and caused the ambulance visit to Perigueux the following week, and I think she should be more mobile now. She injured her left arm, which is still all but useless and, although she did cut her knee, I see no reason why her legs won’t work. Unless she is simply not eating enough food. Her portions are tiny, no point in me putting more on her plate, only to be left for my next day’s lunch or the dogs’ dinners.
Anticipating a gruelling day and not being up to cooking tonight, I made a big beef stew in the Crockpot which will be ready by 9 this evening. I have warned her that I will accept no leavings, but I won’t give her much of the meat, she is turning from a red blooded meat eater into a real veggie, but just not enough, that’s all. 
David… reading what you have written… it seems clear to me that you need help… to get your wife to a medical checkup NOW rather than have to wait until end of December…
I do hope your neighbour can help organize this…
good luck.
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Oh David, such a shame. You really do need help in these situations and a taxi driver/driveress could have made the difference. Doesn’t help you to harp on about it of course, but perhaps really try to get this organised for next attempt?
If she is not moving about at all then her muscles will be wasting away. Is there any chance she would accept you doing gentle leg movements for a few minutes ever day? Perhaps you used to go dancing together and could remind her of that?
Some of these?
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A single driver wouldn’t have helped, a wheelchair is what is needed and that is my fault, I waited too long hoping our own pharmacy would be open. They know us well and have always been a great help in the past.
Then I thought as long as I could get her to the car I would be able to borrow a wheelchair at the hospital, even the drop off point outside the main entrance is a long way to walk and get up to the first floor.
I try with the exercises of course, but as she often does not want to get out of bed, not so easy.
I rather think your Doctor needs to authorize SAMU to collect your wife… they will be so gentle and have the equipment necessary to take her out of the house and off to the Doc/hospital/whatever…
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