People vary greatly in their ability to judge how others see them, Chris, and in their ability to recognise emotional responses in others. The distribution of these subtle faculties of emotional intelligence are much like the spread across populations of cognitive intelligence (IQ), and neither of these relate to character or other personality attributes.
Some people are very good at deconstructing complex sentences, others aren’t. Some people are very skilled at manipulating objects in space, others are ‘clumsy’. Some people have excellent listening skills, others of otherwise superior intelligence have very poor recall of what they’ve heard, however attentively they try to listen (I am one such).
Few of us do full justice to the diversity of the species, and some (sadly) tend to assume that people are, or ought to be, “like me/us”; and if they aren’t they’re deficient or thick.
When people ask for feedback I think one’s default position should be to respect the validity of the request, and the courage it takes to make it. The world might be a better place if we all tried to admit this as a useful and constructive rule of thumb.