Argumentum ad hominem (Survive France Guidelines)

As Survive France is getting bigger by the day, we thought it might be a good idea to produce some guidelines on posting.

Survive France is a social network designed to help people connect, interact, do business, network, socialise and exchange information in a mutually supportive and helpful environment. We expect members to behave as if they were face to face and restrain from abusive Ad hominem attacks. If you are not sure what this means, you can read about it here - in layman’s terms, it means refrain from personal comments and criticism. Anyone who cannot do this will have their membership suspended.

Debate is fine but keep it polite and keep the ‘dinner party’ analogy in mind. If you were at someone’s house and were seated next to a person whose views you found abhorrent, you would not call them names. Or if you did, you probably wouldn’t get invited back! Instead, out of respect to your hosts, you would mutter something along the lines of “Oh well, we will just have to disagree” and find another guest to talk to.

In the same way, if you walked into a pub and sat down at a table of people discussing the eurozone, you wouldn’t interrupt the conversation to announce that “I install swimming pools” - so yes, do promote what you do, but keep it relevant.

As you know James and I run this site and put huge amounts of time, effort and money into it. We think it is a great resource and the positive feedback we get is wonderful. However, we cannot be everywhere all the time. There are occasions when we are away from the office and cannot deal with issues immediately. We may even be oblivious to them. If this happens and you feel there is an issue that needs addressing, please get in touch with us first and allow us time to deal with it.

Thank you for reading this - now please lets carry on doing what we do best on Survive France - being constructive!

J&C, and all, as you know i'm on and off here - depending on the season! but i have been here for a while, and the site has proved hugely useful for me. I honestly don't think I could have survived france without it - and i recommend to people... but two things are really pigging me off!

black box new members - seriously - if you can be bothered to put up a pic of your beautiful house, you have th ability to put up a picture of yourself... new members, grand. new member just be lazy? not so much

and also... sorry - but if you ask for advice, and someone answers - please please PLEASE say thank you. I do it myself, to each person, except in the case where many many have replied and then say 'thank you all' or something like that. I've had great, brilliant, practical advise here.

I try and add mine when i think i know something!

x teresa

1 Like

I hope I'm not Davis grey. My observations were based on experience of other sites on which I see many (not all) Brits posting comments which are derogatory to the French and seem to express a curiously antipathetic attitude to the country which they have made their home. I suspect that for many such it will be a temporary and short-lived home.

1 Like

i really like this site too - but racist comments like Davis grey made are not conducive to good relations

its like saying all the yanks are boasters and all the french are dirty etc etc not true in either case

keep up the good work

1 Like

I really like this site. It's so pleasant not to have continual whinging from Brits.I cannot understand their mentality and their paranoic belief that they are always being ripped off. Keep up the good work.

Thank you for posting this in this context. If I was getting even mildly heated then it was for this level to be retaned and not what is happening at present.

that … sorry mis keyed! lol

hello everybody - I am a newbee to this site and very excited at the prospect of getting to know some of you. My intention is to move to France next year (house on market etc) and to practice my Art and Reiki so… if there is anyone out there who is a Reiki initiate or is even remotely interested in it (or yoga, meditation any of thagt spiritual stuff!!!do get in touch it would be great to connect XXXX loveXXXX

Well said
Iwas given a lot of nastiness on a Facebook page (which was stopped) it really upset me at a time when I had much more serious stuff going on and made me feel quite ill so what you say about being polite is so true and being kind is also important do as you would be done by my dad used to say

Well said, this would make a great rules of engagement page. It would probably increase serious members too.Maybe people could get axed from being able to post after two warnings for inappropriate plugging. It has happened me before to not have time to enter the conversation but to put up a link that I know fits right into the “propos,” This two chances would give missposters a benift of the doubt. As for rudeness I believe that they should be cut off immediate. It is a privilage to be a SFN not a right.
I have my own small once a weekly blog and I appriciate that the work is huge. Congratulations on an excelent site.

I would like to second Nigel’s comment. It a bit difficult getting useful (and often humorous) info about where I would like to eventually live when you are buried in DDA (Deepest Darkest Africa) and this site has been a ray of sunshine and an enormous help.I am sure it is a tremendous amount of work but believe me, it is much appreciated

I love this site and I am glad I found it as I have learnt a lot from other peoples experiences of living in France. It also gives me a chuckle every now and again when I read some of the tongue in cheek blog posts. The only thing I haven’t done is post a picture on my profile - anyone want to give me guidance? But please remember I am retired and known to be a bit forgetfull and maybe not a fully licenced teccie. Promise I will post a picture guaranteed to frighten the horses!

It’s a shame when people post rude, offensive or downright weird responses to your questions, anecdotes, blogs etc. I try to refrain from responding immediately & apply the 24 hour sleep on it rule which means the next day you actually think - oh well I can ignore that it’s not important (used to do this at work when one of those annoying type of emails came through!)

The 99.9% of useful, helpful, humerous and amusing responses I get to my SFN contributions from friendly members are the reasons I continue to support SFN, James & Catharine as best I can x

it’s a great site, I’m glad I found it, everyone seems so nice and friendly and it’s good to “chat” and have a laugh, esp when one isn’t always happy with one’s lot (it happens) So thank you and keep up the good work

Civil behaviour and “knowing” with whom we are speaking is what sets SFN apart from other sites and long may it be so.

Thanks Nigel! xx